Kaidan's Doctor
by DandelionFable
Summary: Kaidan's interest is piqued when Shepard's lost long sister joins them on the Normandy - winding up in a bar, years after the attack on Mindoir. A beautiful, strong-willed woman, much like her sister, with powerful biotics; will it be love for Major Alenko? Or tragedy? Starts during Citadel DLC and follows story with a few sisterly tweaks here and there. Alternate ending. AU
1. Coincidence?

The idea was ridiculous – to Kaidan, at least.

"I'm fine Shepard!" His commanding officer gave him 'that look', the slight raise of her eyebrow accompanied with a slight twitch in the corner of her mouth. Kaidan ripped his eyes away from her with a frown.

"How many times do I need to say it before you accept that I'm not looking for that to be in my life right now." The very idea of starting something with someone in the middle of a war was a prospect that he didn't even want to think about. He had been tempted, countless times but that just brought back memories from BAaT, and his time with Rahna.

What if he did find someone in the midst of this chaos that played with death, misery and grief like it was a game and then he lost control? He might do something rash or have his personal feelings get in the way of his orders. No. He was a Spectre now and he couldn't afford distractions.

Shepard disagreed.

"I thought exactly the same as you when I was going after the Collectors, but look at what happened between Garrus and me."

"That was different. Neither of you knew if you were going to come back—"

"It feels the same to me." She crossed her arms and gave him 'the look' again. "Maybe you just need someone who will give you a reason to fight."

"I have a reason to fight," he protested to no avail, "I fight for humanity and for survival."

"Those are noble goals Kaidan but you need something else. Something more personal. Something that will burn inside of you like a fire at the thought of losing it." Her eyes looked far away and Kaidan realized that she was lost in her thoughts again.

"Garrus and I have each other," she said absentmindedly, "We fight so that we can have a future together. So what do you have to fight for?"

He began to see her point, although he didn't admit it. Admitting something like that to Shepard would bring back 'the look' only this time she would give a smug little grin that yelled out 'I told you so'. He kept quiet.

"What do you want from me Commander?" he asked tersely, which made her laugh – a rarity in itself. "I want you to come with me and some of the team to Purgatory for a few drinks. We can have a bit of a laugh – probably over my dancing – and then you can see if anyone catches your fancy. Deal?"

He figured it was a fair enough deal. He could just have a few drinks, relax a little and then come back to the Normandy.

"Deal."

* * *

The violent pulses and dark rhythms made Kaidan's blood dance as his group made their way towards the lower bar. EDI and Joker were already sitting at a table together close by, and Kaidan shook his head in disbelief at the abnormality of the situation. Of course it would be just like Joker to actually find a way to date his ship – the Alliance major supposed that as long as they were happy, that was all that mattered.

"So do you see anyone?" Shepard grinned at him over a shot glass in her hand. He nodded towards it, attempting to change the subject,

"What are you drinking?" Commander Shepard shrugged, "Damned if I know. I just told him to give me something strong. Anyway, you changed the subject." Damn.

"We've been here all of a minute and you think that I've got my eye on someone?" He instinctively scanned the area around him as an afterthought. Asides from Shepard's group there were not many people around the lower bar – most had gone upstairs onto the dance floor and the noise from above was tremendous as people cheered and raved to the music.

There was one other person at the bar drinking – but she also seemed to be doing dancing as well. The woman, Kaidan saw, was downing shots every few minutes before returning to an energetic and well-rehearsed dance, clearly practiced from visiting the club regularly.

Shepard noticed his lingering gaze on the woman and glanced behind her to see what was distracting him. Once she noticed that it was the dancing woman behind her, she gave him the dreaded 'look'. "Not interested in anybody, huh?" she smirked, watching with satisfaction as Kaidan hurriedly returned his attention to her.

"I wasn't—I mean I'm not!" He stumbled over his words in an attempt to keep Shepard's smirk at bay but as usual it didn't work.

"Go and talk to her," He looked at his commanding officer in horror. "I couldn't! I'm not even interes—"But Shepard just kept smirking. Only then it got worse, because now Garrus and James had decided to stop staying silent out of amusement. Now it was three on one.

"Come on Alenko," James insisted, "Just buy her a drink and do something to impress her," Kaidan briefly glanced in her direction again, where the red-haired woman had just downed yet another shot. "Don't you think that would come across as being slightly creepy? I mean how do I start a conversation with a complete stranger?" Garrus and James laughed.

"We're in the middle of a night club Kaidan," Garrus pointed out, "You either come here with friends to have a good time or you come alone to find a good time." The major could feel the blood rising to his cheeks. It had been a long time since he had tried to pick up women, not since Rahna. Of course then there was the time on the SR1 when he had picked up on the wrong signals from Shepard and come out of the situation with a growing feeling of humiliation. Maybe this would be a chance to put that past him. A harmless bit of flirting.

"Fine," he got up from his seat while Shepard watched him in disbelief. She knew she teased him about being single all the time but she never thought he would actually react from it all. Not like that anyway.

Kaidan took a deep breath and searched for the woman. In the time it had taken to persuade him to give this a shot, some people – mainly a small group of batarians – had streamed back into the lower bar from the dance floor. Among them all, Kaidan spotted a bright flame of hair bouncing to the beat of the club sound.

That was when things started to go downhill. The batarians had formed a barricade between Shepard's group and the lone woman but Kaidan could still make out what was happening. The leader of the batarian group had an ugly scar down the side of his face and he had grabbed the woman from behind. Now she stood facing the barricade while Kaidan watched, trying to formulate enough of a plan that he might be able to help her.

"Aren't you sweet," Scar-face leered at her, tightening his hold around her torso. To any other onlookers it appeared that a batarian and a human were just in a very tight embrace but Kaidan knew different. The bartender had gone, probably to save himself, Kaidan thought in disgust.

Scar-face was in for a bit of a surprise. "I'm going to give you three seconds to let go of me and fuck off," she said sweetly, but her eyes were blazing with anger. The ugly batarian laughed – it sounded like a turian drowning – but didn't let her go.

"And if I don't?" He growled.

"Then I'm going to show you what Purgatory really looks like." Kaidan admired her gall. Not many could remain calm in a situation like this, which reminded him that he should be looking for a way to help. But he couldn't. Some part of him was compelled to just watch as this anger-empowered woman took on a battle-scarred batarian. It was wrong of him and his conscience screamed at him to do something but he couldn't. His curiosity had gotten the better of him.

Her hands glowed as she summoned the dark energy that stormed her body. Scar-face howled in pain as it made contact with him – and in that moment of his hesitation, she broke free from his grasp and turned to face him.

"Biotic bitch!" he spat.

"I did warn you," she retorted. Perhaps this would be it, and she would let him run from the club with his lesson learned. Somehow Kaidan doubted it. Scar-face had really pissed her off.

He was right.

She lifted the batarian with dark, crushing arms and pulled him towards her until he was right in front of her, trapped in a biotic stasis and completely at her mercy. "What to do with you…" she smirked and then she turned and looked over at Kaidan, to his surprise.

"What do you think?" She called to him, "You've been watching for long enough to have an opinion." Embarrassment crept up his spine – she had known he had been watching the entire time. She must think he was a coward or some other horrific person no better than the batarian.

He shrugged awkwardly but focused on the dark energy inside of him. The barricade of batarians was still there and he was determined to get rid of them as some sort of way to apologize for his idleness. He pulled two of them away with his biotic arm and the others scattered in alarm at the thought of being attacked by another biotic. Now only Scar-face remained, only now his cruel face didn't show menace, it showed fear.

The woman nodded her thanks to him before bringing her attention back to her prisoner. "I think I'll let you off the hook," she told the batarian, "But not without some sort of reprimand." There was a crack! that sent a piercing scream over the club beat. Kaidan winced as he noticed that three of Scar-face's finger had been bent back at a dangerously unnatural angle. He fell to the floor as she ceased to hold him with a stasis field and he stuck his hands out on instinct to delay his fall. The force of his broken fingers making contact with the dance floor sent another scream out over the rhythm.

"Get out of here." He stood and fled while she watched, vengeance shining through her eyes. With her attacker gone, she now brought her attention back to Kaidan.

"Your biotics are amazing!" Kaidan blurted out. He couldn't help it. The amount of energy she had just used was extraordinary. In her place, Kaidan couldn't help wondering if he would have been able to stay standing.

Her face lit up and she gave a little bow, "Thanks! I've been working on that stasis hold for ages. That was the first time I've been able to hold it for so long – I think maybe my inner rage is the secret." She winked at him, "You're not so shabby yourself, Major Alenko." Kaidan's heart was blurred with mixed feelings. If she knew who he was then maybe he shouldn't go on with his plan. It wouldn't be wise.

"You know who I am?" She laughed at his surprised face. "Of course! You are the second human Spectre. Congrats by the way. That's a big deal, but you serve on the Normandy so I'm sure you can handle it." She was charming, that was for sure.

"I'm Doctor Avalon," she said with a smile, "Doctor Avalon Shepard. I believe you know my sister."


	2. Joining the Squad

There was another Shepard. Kaidan needed to sit down.

Avalon giggled at his dumbstruck face when he tried to process this information quietly without showing his surprise, but failing miserably. How could Shepard have a sister – one that was alive? Her entire family was killed on Mindoir by slavers, or so the personnel records stated.

"I'm guessing that this is a bit of a surprise then?" There was a trace of bitterness underneath her bright voice but her eyes portrayed nothing. Kaidan nodded. Maybe he would ask his commander about it later – although if she hadn't said anything about by now he doubted that his asking would do anything except annoy her.

"I thought everyone on Mindoir except Shepard was either killed or taken by the batarians. It's on Shepard's record that her whole family died."

"Not the whole family," Avalon interjected, "I was taken by the slavers. I tried to kill the one who killed my parents. My sister wasn't with us when they attacked so she couldn't do anything to help us. By the time she got back to our home the only thing waiting for her was the corpses of everyone who had resisted." she took a deep breath. Visiting her history was painful and it had been a while since she had gone back to the day she was taken.

"Why didn't the slaver you attacked just kill you?" Kaidan wondered out loud, "They don't usually let resistance go unpunished."

"My biotics." The doctor stated. "As far as they were concerned biotics rolled in more credits than any other slave. Well worth the wrath of a ten year old." The thought of a ten year old girl trying to unleash biotic hell on a bewildered batarian was almost enough to make Kaidan smile – but he stopped himself before he got into an awkward situation. Doctor Shepard was confiding in him – the last thing she needed was for someone to laugh at her story.

Behind him Kaidan could hear his commanding officer trading jokes about him with Garrus and James. Commander Shepard obviously didn't recognize her sister. How long had it been since she had seen her little sister? Did she even know that she was still alive?

"She doesn't know I'm here," Avalon's voice reached him and he met her eyes, "We spoke briefly at the hospital when you were there and I was overseeing your injuries. I figured it wasn't the best time to say anything. She knows I'm alive though – I sent her a message when she was with Cerberus, but she never replied."

"You should go and talk to her," Kaidan insisted, "It might be the only chance you get with this war going on." But already the doctor was shaking her head.

"My sister was always a hothead. If I go and try and explain all of this to her now she wouldn't take it well – she might even hit me." Kaidan couldn't exactly disagree with her there. The commander was well known for taking drastic actions even when they weren't necessary – but that was how she had survived Torfan so no one could really blame her for applying the same methods to everything in her life.

"You could still talk to her," Kaidan swallowed nervously, "I could introduce you as my…date or something if you want." Her eyes glinted with amusement and he smiled in spite of how awkward he was coming across as.

"I gotta say Alenko," she downed another shot, "I've had guys ask me out before but none of them have ever been as smooth as you." She held out her arm to him and he took it – hesitating only slightly. He guided her over to his friends who had decided to move their little gathering over to the table where EDI and Joker usually sat at together. While he had been away, a few more of the crew had come over – Cortez, Liara and Traynor had now joined them and they all looked up when they saw the Major approach with a woman on his arm.

James grinned at him, "You did it!" He started to applaud and soon the whole group had joined him despite the fact that only three of them knew why. Avalon glanced at Kaidan. "I take it I was expected?"

He looked guilty, "James wanted me to talk to you so that I could prove that I was capable of talking to women." She laughed, "Well you certainly got me to talk." Avalon withdrew her arm and sat on one of the sofas around the table, next to Liara. "Doctor Avalon Sheperd." she said offering her hand to the asari, who shook it with a look of curiosity at the mention of her last name.

"Doctor, huh?" Garrus mused, "Are you a Chakwas doctor, a Mordin doctor or a Liara doctor?" The group laughed and Kaidan cringed. They were obviously trying to mess around with their new companion by confusing her. He attempted to explain what the turian meant but Avalon had already taken it all in her stride, "It's quite all right Major. I know exactly what he means." she turned to Garrus.

"I'm a bit of all three I suppose. I don't exactly kill Blue Suns and stick their corpses outside of my clinic like Dr. Solus did but I can still fight; I don't help patients 24/7 in a hospital or on a starship like Dr. Chakwas but I'm still one of the best damn doctors on the Citadel. As for Dr. T'Soni…" Avalon's body began to illuminate the area with dark energy, "I guess you can say I know a _bit_ about biotics – and I might not be the Shadow Broker but… I'd say I'm well-informed, don't you?"

Garrus and James began laughing – _really_ laughing – unable to stop, but through great efforts the turian managed to wheeze out, "That one. That one's a keeper Kaidan!" The major smiled to himself, first Shepard and now Avalon. He certainly knew how to pick them. But then he shook his head – he hadn't _picked_ Avalon, it wasn't like they were together or anything. He didn't know what to think when his heart plummeted at the thought of never talking to the brazen doctor again.

Commander Shepard hadn't said anything yet since Kaidan and the doctor had come over. He remembered how Avalon had introduced herself to the group – it hadn't been very subtle. He wondered if maybe the commander suspected that it was her sister who had joined them. Only time would tell. What Kaidan said next wasn't something he had planned, it just sort of… happened.

"I think that the doctor would be a great asset to the team."


	3. A Moment Cut Short

Everyone stopped talking and turned to look at him, eyes wide – all except EDI that is, who appeared to be processing what he had said. Commander Shepard spoke up, "That's not your decision Kaidan. It's mine." Her voice sounded cold and disconnected – nothing at all like she had sounded when she teased Kaidan earlier on. She definitely knew it was her sister, Kaidan thought to himself, so what was holding her back?

He looked to Liara and EDI for support. The asari opened her mouth to speak but then EDI turned her head towards him, "Shepard, I have just run my own diagnostics on the doctor and what Major Alenko said is accurate. Doctor Shepard has the latest L6 implants and is a well-respected staff member of the Huerta Memorial Hospital. Her medical, tech and combat expertise would be invaluable."

Avalon went slightly red under the flickering club lights but beamed at the AI. Shepard looked as though she was going to give in. "Would you be willing to join us Doctor?"

"Please, just call me Avalon – it'll be easier. I'd love to serve on the Normandy, if you'll have me Commander."

Shepard stood up and the doctor did the same thing. "Welcome aboard Avalon," the commander offered her hand and Avalon grasped it firmly. "Thank you Commander."

* * *

The Normandy crew were still officially on shore leave while the frigate was repaired by the engineers of the Citadel. It wasn't the most exciting way to join the crew but Avalon didn't mind - it was a miracle to even be considered as _part of the team_ although she suspected it would take a lot more than just an invitation in the middle of a club to be one of the team.

After the gathering had dispersed - Shepard had gone to see her new apartment - it was just Avalon and the Alliance major left loitering by the club's entrance. She felt like she should say thank you to him but she couldn't find the words. In a brief conversation she had revealed more to him than she had to anybody else and the thought made her feel uneasy - was she going soft?

"I want to show you something." she told the major, "Follow me." What was she doing? But a destination was already in her mind and so she went with the flow, following her feet as they led her to the rapid transit station close by. The ride was short and they both stepped out onto the roof of Purgatory. The Citadel's night cycle was close and beneath the dimming lights of the Wards and the faint thrum of the club beat Avalon felt safe.

"This is beautiful!" Kaidan breathed, gazing down on the city below them. Avalon sat on the edge of the roof; legs dangling while gesturing for the major to do the same. "I always used to come up here when I first came to the Citadel," she said softly. "God, I was a mess then - seventeen years old and going nowhere. It was a miracle I'd managed to get here at all after I escaped from my master." She shuddered at the thought of the salarian doctor who had purchased her for a very high price - he called himself Doctor Heart and he did horrible experiments on other people. He always used to whisper to her after he was done with each victim that " _Her time was near."_

"Avalon?" Kaidan couldn't disguise the concern in his voice and it jolted her back to the present. "Are you okay? You've gone pale."

She breathed in, filling her lungs with cool air that made her feel tranquil. Now was not the time to bring up ghosts.

"I'm okay." Warm hands enclosed around her cold ones and it sent a single electric shiver through her body. No words were said but they just stayed like that, watching the skycars go past; lost in their own thoughts.

Minutes went by until the night cycle loomed over their heads, "Avalon-" Kaidan was cut off by a transmission.

"Kaidan! Are you there?" Liara's voice startled both of them and they jumped apart like guilty lovesick teenagers. "Liara? What's happened?" He stood up and began pacing, awaiting for the bad news to arrive.

"Joker just showed up after meeting with Shepard at that new sushi place and says that they were attacked!" Kaidan couldn't believe it - or he _could,_ he just didn't want to. Trust Shepard to find trouble in a sushi bar.

"Did he say anything else? Is Shepard with him?"

"No she isn't. Some Alliance woman called Brooks apparently warned them that Shepard's communications were being hacked just before the attack. He also wouldn't shut up about 'being used as bait.' Brooks is trying to track her now I think but the team is meeting on the Silversun Strip until then."

"We're on our way," Kaidan promised.

"We? Who else are you with?" He could tell from Liara's voice that she had raised her eyebrows. Even in the midst of a crisis like this his personal life was still something to be marvelled at apparently.

"Avalon and I are coming," he ended the call.

"Where are we going?" Avalon asked. She was used to this - urgent matters that needed dealing with quickly and efficiently. It gave her something to focus on which was probably why she had liked her work at Huerta Memorial so much.

"Silversun Strip. We're meeting the team there. I'll explain on the way." They got back into the skycar that they had left parked behind them. Their blood was pumping now and they were ready. The skycar disagreed.

"Can't this thing go any faster?" He asked as they drove. They weren't going particularly fast. Ten minutes along and they still hadn't reached their destination. "We're almost there," Avalon shot back.

The Strip was something to be marvelled at - the neon and bustling night crowds gave it a good feeling, similar to the usual crowd that hung out at Purgatory, except these people were filthy rich and could afford spending time in a casino in the middle of a galactic war. They found a place to park and jumped out, running towards the team that they saw assembled by Ryuusei's Sushi Bar.

Avalon had heard legendary stories about the team but she wasn't prepared to see all of them there in the flesh. There was a Prothean - a living, breathing Prothean - in front of her, fully armoured and everything! Not to mention Joker - the famed pilot was the best in the entire Alliance fleet and here he was - having a heated discussion with a giant krogan about 'being used as bait' while simultaneously talking to someone over his comm. A woman in an Alliance uniform was nervously fidgeting to one side.

There was one person missing - Garrus.

Liara caught sight of them as they drew near, "Good, now we're all here. Joker picked up Staff Analyst Brooks while we were assembling"

"Where's Garrus?" asked Kaidan, although he doubted he needed to ask. There was no way the turian renegade would wait with the rest of the team while Shepard was being hunted.

"He went on ahead to find Shepard," the asari doctor looked weary, "He didn't want to wait long enough for everyone to get here."

"No time to lose then," James already had his shotgun drawn.

"Guys!" Joker had managed to get himself a shuttle, "I've got a location on Shepard - she's with Garrus outside Cision Motors in a skycar lot but under heavy fire. I can get in and make an extraction but I'm gonna need some fire support," Kaidan watched as Wrex smirked and jumped on top of the shuttle.

"This oughta be fun," the krogan rumbled.

"Wrex…" Liara said warningly, but the krogan just shrugged. "It's been too long since I've killed stuff with Shepard. Like the humans like to say, 'There's no time like the present.' Isn't that right Kaidan?" The major chuckled.

The team boarded the shuttle and while Joker raced towards their destination, Liara attempted to get a connection to Shepard.

"Shepard! We just heard what happened - everyone is on their way," Avalon's heart was racing. The mood seemed light despite everything and she was enjoying the adrenaline that was pulsing through her body. She felt light, alert and ready to take on everything - maybe even a krogan. Well maybe not Wrex.

BOOM! The whole shuttle shook and creaked while Kaidan and Avalon watched through the shuttle cameras as Wrex through his body off of the vehicle and through the glass roof of Cision Motors. "What is he doing!" Avalon gasped. Joker kept driving. Off in the distance was the faint cry of: "I AM KROGAAAN!"

"It would appear that Urdnot Wrex is re-enacting his arrival on the salarian homeworld." EDI said matter of factly. Kaidan groaned, "Do I even want to ask?"

Javik shook his head, "No. You do not."

The ongoing sound of gunfire could be heard over the shuttle engines and Joker quickly sped up and then dangerously swerved to one side and then another. Avalon's stomach churned as the vehicle rolled over and she was thrown into Kaidan who miraculously caught her before she hit the wall.

"Thanks," she mumbled before pulling away, painfully aware that James was grinning at her. Kaidan blushed, "No problem."

"Stupid taxi drivers!" Joker yelled, "I was in my zone!"

"There!" Kaidan had never heard Javik yell before in a non-combat situation but apparently the Prothean was desperate to escape from being trapped in a shuttle with so many 'primitives'. Joker almost crashed again as he tightly pulled in and opened the shuttle door. Garrus and Wrex threw themselves in before the turian held out his hand to help up Commander Shepard - who somehow had escaped the entire ordeal no worse for wear.

"Glad to see you're still in one piece Commander." Avalon said, while Shepard practically fell to her knees with exhaustion. "I heard you fell through a fish tank," She was answered with a swift glare and the doctor laughed.

"Let's just get back to my apartment," the commander said weakly.

"Are you sure we can do that without starting another war?" Kaidan asked dryly.

"I'll do my best." she shot back.


	4. Clone vs Sister

**Thank you so much for all of the follows and favourites, it really means so much that you're taking the time to come back and experience my story! Special shout out to** **FlowerMaiden05** **who gave me my first review :) Enjoy!**

"Let me get this straight," Avalon said as soon as Shepard had changed out of her casino dress and into her armour. "You want to break into the _Citadel Archives_ in the hopes of finding the person responsible for all of this? You don't even know if they'll still be there!"

"Well we'd better get moving then!" said Wrex, "I want to find this damn pyjak and tear his scrawny head off!"

"Calm down Wrex," Garrus said sharply, "We can't let this get to us - not when we're so close to finding them."

"You're wrong Vakarian - letting this get to us is exactly what we need to do; feel the rage and then RAH, you leave them to drown in their blood."

Liara sighed, "Let's just go." EDI turned to the commander. "Shepard - if I were to accompany you in the Archives then maybe I could be of some assistanc-"

"I've made up my mind EDI," Shepard said firmly, "Wrex and Garrus are with me and you'll be with the others." The artificial intelligence gave a disappointed nod, "Very well Shepard."

* * *

Despite all of the possible outcomes of who the enemy was, the last thing Kaidan expected was for it to be Shepard - or her clone. If it was him, Kaidan wasn't sure how he would have been able to mask his shock. Luckily it wasn't him and it was Shepard. Otherwise the mission probably would have failed.

"I'm you without the wear and tear Shepard, the doubts, the failures. I'm the lone wolf you were always meant to be… without the emotional baggage holding me back." the clone says casting a look above her where Kaidan, Avalon and the rest of Team Hammerhead were being held at gunpoint by a bunch of CAT6 mercs.

"No one will ever believe you're Shepard." Wrex snarled.

"They will when I'm flying her ship."

Shepard's hand flew to her ear, "This is Shepard! Initiate Normandy lockdown! Transmitting command codes now!" Her omni-tool was already out but the clone was faster.

"That's a good idea," it smirked, "Too bad the signal was blocked." The commander looked like she would explode from rage when her clone gave her 'the look' that she had given Kaidan so long ago in Purgatory. On the upside, the major thought to himself, at least Shepard will stop giving 'the look' to everyone now. He decided to take his victories where he could now that it seemed that failure was inevitable.

"Hey!" Avalon was shoved to her knees and Clone Shepard glared at the CAT6 merc who had caused the outburst. He shrugged, "She was trying to zap me with her powers." Beside him, Kaidan could hear Liara groan as the merc referred to Avalon's biotics as 'powers'. But at the sight of Shepard's sister, the clone grew curious. "Throw her down here!"

"If you touch me I swear I'l-" Avalon's threats were met with a gun slammed into her temple. "Speak when spoken to!" the merc barked. The doctor's body crumpled just before she was kicked over the edge of the platform and landed hard - directly between Shepard and the clone.

"What have we here?"

Avalon bit her tongue. The pain was lacing its way through her body and clouding her mind with blossoms of hurt but she was determined that she would not cry. She would not cry, she would not-

"She looks like me doesn't she Shepard?" the clone remarked, "The same red hair, green eyes, defiant expression. But she can't be my sister because I left my sister to be slaughtered on that pathetic human colony because deep down I knew that she would just prevent me from reaching greatness." Shepard's hand curled into a fist and her clone gasped in mock surprise.

"That _is_ why you left the colony with the Alliance without even looking for your sister, right?" Avalon swore under her breath; foul profanities at the clone who in return laughed.

"It's her you should be swearing at. I'm not the one who left you to die. I'm the one who is about to offer you a place at my side as an equal. Not a castaway sister to be left in the shadows." Opportunity.

Avalon slowly lifted her head to meet the clone's gaze, "You'd sooner kill me just to tie up loose ends."

"Is that so?" The clone crouched down and helped Avalon up who at first pushed away but her whole body felt like it was about to shatter into pieces and so she had two choices - accept help or fall to the ground and shatter. Some choice.

"You have so much potential Avvy," Clone Shepard said, "Just imagine what we could do. Two sisters serving as commanding officers on the Normandy together. Protecting each other and kicking ass together. _She_ won't give you that." The clone jerked her head at the real Shepard, "But I will."

 _Avvy._ Her sister used to call her that back on Mindoir. Avalon cast a look behind her at Shepard who was watching intently with Garrus and Wrex behind her and then up to meet Kaidan's concerned gaze.

"I'm sorry."


	5. Reconciliation

There was one biotic trick that Avalon had never had the chance to use before and it seemed appropriate to use it now. Of course one of the reasons she didn't practice it much either was because of the sheer amount of energy that was needed to pull off the supercharge (or nova, as biotics referred to it as) and in her current state there was a 50/50 chance that it would completely eviscerate her insides. It was either that or be a useless broken heap and a liability while they tried to fight their way out. Avalon liked her chances of 'Operation Nova' working better.

Everyone was staring at her expectantly while Clone Shepard grinned triumphantly at the real Shepard who - Kaidan noted - was giving off a murderous glare that was enough to make him look away. The major wasn't sure what Avalon was about to do but he knew enough about her to know that she wasn't about to turn traitor. And then he saw it - that glint in her eye - even from above he could tell that what she was about to do would be powerful - and biotic.

He just hoped she could handle it.

Gathering her strength the doctor braced herself for the rhythmic hum as the dark energy twisted and curled inside of her, seeping through her bones and out towards her fingertips; seeking its escape. Cork in a bottle, she thought to herself desperately as the energy coiled its way around her body in a tight embrace. Cork in a bottle.

She charged.

In that moment the mercs opened fire. Kaidan couldn't see whether or not Avalon's plan had worked because he'd been distracted by a CAT6 merc who had tried to get the jump on Lieutenant Cortez - he'd barreled into Steve just in time to feel the bullet barely brush past the side of his head.

"Thanks!" Cortez yelled as he got back up on his feet with his assault rifle back in hand. They were on the outskirts of the chaos - below them the fighting was much heavier and more intense. But then Kaidan heard the confused yelling of the CAT6 unit as they realised that the clone had been incapacitated.

"Screw this! I'm not dying for a clone!" the merc nearest him said at last, sending out a message on his comm for everyone to fall back because 'the clone had failed to wipe out the cult of Shepard'.

So the unit fell back, but that didn't stop the 'cult of Shepard' from firing shots at the stray mercenaries who were taking their sweet time. Team Hammerhead and Team Mako made it back to the ground floor to find their commander crouched over the body of the clone.

"Is she…?" Liara felt guilty. This clone was her fault. She was the one who had handed Shepard's body - her DNA - to Cerberus. It was stupid and naive of her to think that they wouldn't attempt to replicate Shepard in this way.

"It's still alive," Shepard said quietly.

"Good!" Wrex pushed his way to the front of the crowd, "I can think of at least twenty-three different ways we can make her suffer while she's knocked out and the last time I tried them on this Blood Pack merc I only got to sixteen before his head exploded!"

"I would prefer to get this over with quickly krogan." Javik remarked, "Your methods sound as though they would take a while."

Wrex shrugged, "Whatever. It was pretty messy. Took months before I could get all the vorcha brain off my armour."

Shepard drew her omni-blade and held it against the clone's neck, hesitating only slightly before she sliced through the soft flesh, blood bubbling from the fresh wound. "Done." she murmured.

"Hey where's Brooks?" James sounded disappointed by the absence of the Staff Analyst.

"I believe that Staff Analyst Brooks managed to escape the Archives during the firefight." EDI reported. "It is possible that she will contact Shepard via the extranet once she is able."

"Strange for her to just leave without saying anything though," James frowned, but then shrugged it off.

Kaidan couldn't see the doctor. "Avalon!" he called out, searching the room. But there was nobody else there except from the corpse of Clone Shepard. Where the hell was she?

"Over here." Javik called, on his knees by a desk. The team rushed over to find the doctor curled up on the floor - out cold. "Her life signs are weak," the Prothean said, lifting her body up and over his shoulders, "She needs medical care."

"Drop her off at Huerta Memorial before we go," Shepard said, preparing to leave. "No!" It wasn't Kaidan who had made the outburst but rather Javik. Kaidan could see Shepard's temptation of performing the dreaded 'look' but thought better of it with the Prothean warrior.

"You gave her your word that she would be a part of the Normandy crew," Javik reminded them, "What good is that word if you dump her in a hospital the moment something goes wrong? The Normandy is equipped with a medical bay is it not? Use it."

"I think that's the most I've ever heard ol' Prothy the Prothean speak." Even over the comm there was no mistaking his mock-impressed tone. "Now really isn't the time Joker," Shepard said, eyes on Javik. Her mind was still reeling from what her clone had said to Avalon about Mindoir. For a split second Shepard thought that the doctor might have joined the clone even if it was just so she could be treated like a sister again. Shepard felt a stab of guilt as she realised just how childish she had been to ignore her sister's survival after Miranda had forwarded that first message to her private terminal back when she had to stop the Collectors. She didn't know why she hadn't just replied and acknowledged that Avalon was still alive. If their positions were switched then Shepard didn't think she'd ever be able to forgive herself. Yet Avalon must have because otherwise she wouldn't have agreed to serve with her on the Normandy.

But the issue remained that Avalon needed medical care and the Normandy was still undergoing repairs.

"Joker," she said, raising her hand to her ear, "Can you contact the hospital and get through to Doctor Chakwas? We're gonna need her help to bust my sister out of the hospital early once she's been treated."

Silence.

"Joker? Joker, come in!" She thought she heard someone laugh at the other end of the connection. "Is it just me or did you refer to the doctor as your sister? I mean I'm all for girly friendships and everything but I never figured you to be one of _those_ people. Sisters before misters is what they used to say in the old days right?"

"Joker." she said warningly.

"Alright, alright. Contact Chakwas. Got it." The comm went silent for good.

"Let's just get out of here." She turned to find her whole crew looking at her confused - all of them except Kaidan.

"Sounds like you've got one hell of a story to tell us Shepard." Wrex said at last.

She gestured for Javik to go before her with the doctor still slung across his shoulders before she followed him towards the exit.

"I certainly do."

* * *

The life signs had been stabilized. "It'll be a few more hours before she regains consciousness," Chakwas said, "Her body wasn't equipped to deal with the amount of biotic energy that she had created - which given her amp and L6 implants seems almost impossible." the older woman turned to the commander, "It seems that everyone who serves on the Normandy acts almost as reckless as you do Shepard."

"I try my best." the commander replied dryly. Stood behind her was Kaidan who was trying his best not to look worried about seeing Avalon in a hospital bed. He desperately hoped that it was like Chakwas said and that she would wake up in a few hours no worse for wear. It would be encouraging if something actually went according to plan this time.

"I'll watch over her Shepard and I'll contact you when she wakes up." Chakwas promised, "You go out and enjoy what's left of shore leave." the commander nodded and her and Kaidan started towards the door; Kaidan giving one last look at the woman on the hospital bed with her red hair in a tangled mess and her skin so pale that he could easily make out the small scars on her neck and cheek that he had never noticed before. He made a mental note to ask her about them when she woke up.

* * *

The party was already in full swing when Glyph helpfully found the host to inform her that "Somebody is at the door." Shepard glanced around in an attempt to find Grunt who had been by the door monitoring the crowds that had been forming outside, but the krogan had disappeared - probably to retreat to the bathroom somewhere.

"Let them in Glyph." she said, stepping away from the bar where Joker, Garrus and Cortez had gathered and heading towards the entrance to greet their visitor. If it wasn't someone that they knew then Glyph wouldn't have brought the matter to her attention. Maybe it was Avalon, although Chakwas hadn't sent any word yet of her progress at the hospital.

"Welcome Doctor Shepard."

"Glyph." She nodded her head and smiled at the VI who did a little spin in his bowtie before going back to his post by the fireplace that was set in the wall. The doctor studied Shepard's face warily while she tried to read just what the commander was thinking.

"I think we need to talk." Shepard said at last but she was interrupted.

"You're looking better Doctor, I'm glad you could make it." Garrus came up from behind Shepard and put his arm around her waist; letting the commander lean backwards onto his shoulder.

"Garrus." Avalon nodded, but kept her eyes focused on Shepard. They _did_ need to talk before things got any further.

But just when her nerves began to bubble at the bottom of her stomach, Joker wandered over to join them and from the way he was smirking it seemed that he was going to make this a group discussion rather than a private one.

"Commander, you finally gonna explain this sister stuff to us, 'cause I'm finding it kinda hard to process it by myself with all the alcohol in my system."

"This is your sister, Lola?" James checked out the doctor approvingly, "She's hot."

Avalon raised her eyebrows at him and he lifted his arms in a surrender, "No disrespect meant, Doctor."

"Hey Shepard can you get everyone over here?" Cortez was sitting in the lounge area by the fire and it looked like he was about to open another bottle of asari liquor on Jack's request.

"Another bottle already?" Joker asked, "Do I even wanna know where all these drinks came from?"

"I found them in a room upstairs," EDI sits on the sofa and the pilot sits down beside her, "The krogan and asari who lived there were… busy and did not seem to be interested in intoxicating themselves for entertainment purposes."

Everyone had found a spot in the lounge area now and they all stared at the AI.

"That was a joke."

Shepard decided to steer things along, "Are you okay explaining this with everyone here Avalon? It might be easier to understand if you just explain it all once." The doctor nodded slowly. "I think I can manage that."

Somehow everybody except Javik and Wrex managed to squash up on the two sofas although it was a tight squeeze. The Prothean decided he would "rather be thrown out of the airlock than cosy up with a bunch of primitives" while the krogan declared that he'd "better leave Shepard and Garrus enough room." The turian smirked at him. Glyph turned down the music.

"Kaidan already knows most of it." Avalon started, earning looks from both the commander and Joker. Kaidan shifted in his seat beside her nervously, painfully aware of how close he was sitting to the doctor. He felt ridiculous, he shouldn't be in a position where he was nervous around a woman again - especially after the episode at Purgatory a few nights ago - but now that he was with Avalon in the presence of his fellow crew members - both new and old - his mind instinctively flashed the word _fraternization_ to him but he pushed his conscience away determined not to ruin the one thing he had.

But the doctor was hesitant and she appeared distant; green eyes clouded with old memories. It was the same look that she had revealed briefly in Purgatory. Only this time it seemed like she really was lost in the past and unable to drag herself out again.

"Avalon." he said gently, surprising himself when he found his hand reach out to find hers - despite being in company. She blinked.

"Right, sorry."

"How did you survive?" Shepard asked, "The batarians burned down the whole colony."

The flashes of orange and red flame; deafening explosions; cries of children as their families are murdered in front of them before they too are slaughtered and left to rot - these were what Avalon could see. She told the whole crew everything and even included things that she hadn't told Kaidan - how the batarians had violated her when she was a she had finally finished revisiting the horrors that she had to deal with at ten years old, she felt them. Her hot, wet tears running down her dry cheek.

Kaidan squeezed her hand, "You did well."

Shepard was quiet for a moment. Then the commander stood up and moved to kneel in front of where her sister sat. She pulled Avalon into a hug.

"I'm sorry." the older sister said quietly, "I should have been there when they attacked. We could have escaped together. We _should_ have escaped together and I should have protected you."

The doctor took a deep breath, "It's okay. What matters is I got away - and it made me stronger. I'm a doctor now and I can help people - we can help people together now."

"Sounds good."

James stood up, eyes solemn and trained on the doctor while he saluted. "It's an honour to know you ma'am." That made Avalon smile, "You don't need to salute me Vega. I'm just the doctor."

"No," Shepard corrects her, "You're _our_ doctor. Now let's open that bottle of liquor and get this party going again! Tomorrow we're back on the Normandy so let's make the most of this."

The music began to pound again and the gathering split up to the kitchen, the bar and the balcony area. Avalon found herself sitting at the piano, staring at the keys - enchanted.

"I'm proud of you." A familiar voice broke her train of thought and Kaidan placed his hand gently on her shoulder.

"Thank you." Embarrassed, Avalon got up from the piano, aware that it might look like she was about to play something when in reality she had no idea how to play any musical instrument - except perhaps the violin, which her father had briefly taught her how to play back on Mindoir just before she had been outfitted with her first biotic implants.

They walked toward the window and watched the skycars drive into the night. The scene was just like before when they had sat on the roof of Purgatory, before all of this chaos that had led to reparations between Avalon and her older sister. "I realise I should thank you," she said to him, "If you hadn't picked me out of the crowd at the club that night then I'd probably still be there getting drunk on my off hours. It sounds so cliche and terrible but it seems that meeting you was a miraculous coincidence."

Their eyes met - his golden brown and her emerald green - and she reached out to him to caress his cheek while he drew her in with his hands around her waist. It was impulsive and reckless of him, Kaidan knew, but he decided he didn't care any more. He was done trying to be neutral in the middle of a war. Shepard was right - he needed his own reason to fight, and he had found it.

He met her lips with a single, searing kiss; taking Avalon a little by surprise but she soon responded by burying her fingers into his dark hair while his hold around her waist tightened. Her lips were warm and she smelled faintly of antiseptic from the hospital mixed with her own scent of vanilla.

When they finally broke away - a little breathless - they just remained in each other's arms; her hands around his neck when he pulled her in for a hug.

Yes, Kaidan decided.

This was what he was going to fight for.


	6. Back to the Normandy

"Joker, set a course for the Far Rim. There's a quarian envoy ship waiting for us."

"Aye aye Commander."

Shepard went back to her private terminal. Anderson had been true to his word and forwarded a dossier on the assassin that they had encountered back on the Citadel - Kai Leng - and she was determined to analyse anything she had on him. She owed Thane that much at least.

"Having fun?" her sister peered over her shoulder. "Kai Leng? Another potential recruit?"

Shepard snorted, "Hardly. He's the bastard that tried to assassinate the council. Instead he killed Thane Krios, one of my old team members."

"Thane? You mean the drell with Kepral's Syndrome?" Shepard nodded.

"I used to treat him at the hospital but I was off-duty when the Cerberus hit the Citadel. When I found out that he knew you, we started talking more and more until he eventually guessed why." she paused, "I can't believe he's dead. He was a good friend."

"We'll get Leng for him." Shepard promised, but then she processed what her sister had said.

"Thane told you about me?"

Avalon nodded, eyes still trained on the terminal and the words of Cerberus assassin's dossier, "When he figured out that I wasn't going to ask him because 'I was too polite' he started to tell me about his time aboard the Normandy when you were working on taking down the Collectors. He said you were a good woman and the only one willing to see the real threat - even when seeing the threat pushed others away from you. Then he said that I should try to contact you again because after you helped him find his son, he realised just how important family is."

 _Guide this one Kalahira and she will be a friend to you as she was to me._

Shepard stayed quiet. It was hard to think about Thane without also thinking how she had failed him. If she had gotten to the Citadel faster instead of stopping to evacuate Grissom Academy, then she might have met with Councilor Valern before Cerberus arrived.

"Thane was a good man," she said finally.

This was the opportunity that they both wanted. It would take at least an hour to make all the stops they needed to before they arrived at the Far Rim. More than enough time for some sister bonding.

"Want me to show you my cabin?" she asked and Avalon's face lit up.

"Sure." she agreed.

EDI's voice reached them, "Shepard, Specialist Traynor and I have been discussing the sudden disappearance of Staff-Analyst Brooks. After running an analysis on the Alliance personnel database that Major Alenko gave me access to, we have discovered that Staff-Analyst Maya Brooks was assigned to work as an assistant on the Crucible and to our knowledge she had not left her post since she arrived."

Shepard's eyes narrowed, "So who was it we met on the Citadel then?"

"I am unsure. It is possible that she had an ulterior motive when she first approached you in the sushi bar. However, we may be able to track her while we are still in the Citadel but I will require your assistance."

Avalon waved her hand dismissively, "Go and sort that out. I can wait."

The commander hesitated. This could be her last chance to figure out all that she could about her clone and how it had escaped from the Cerberus facility when it was attacked. But then she caught sight of her younger sister attempting to hide her disappointed and the decision was made for her. She might be the commander but her duty didn't just lie with the galaxy. It was time to act like an older sister again.

"EDI, we don't have time to go chasing after rumours and whims again. The quarians won't wait for us long and we _need_ their fleet."

"Understood Shepard."

The commander nodded towards the elevator while Avalon struggled to hide her relief.

"Let's go."

"Wow," Avalon whistled, scoping out the room but letting her gaze rest on the model ship collection in the glass cabinet behind Shepard's desk, "This place is fan-cy."

"Cerberus designed it," said Shepard, sitting down on the sofa, "Of course it's fancy."

Avalon stood by the desk still, pretending to be oddly fascinated with the model ships collection. She had no idea what to talk about and she cursed herself for not having her usual quick and witty attitude ready. Usually she could talk to just about anyone without feeling any sort of anxiety but recently… First with Kaidan and now with her own sister, she felt the nerves creep up on her. She was going soft.

"So Garrus, huh?" She said after she had contemplated her life long enough for the awkward silence to settle in.

Shepard shifted uncomfortably in her seat, "You've noticed?"

Avalon smirked, "I would have to be pretty dense not to have noticed when he put his arm around you yesterday. You know - right in front of me _while_ you were both talking to me?"

"Were you always such a smartass?"

"I think so."

This was the sister that Avalon remembered, which reminded her…

"Why does everyone call you Shepard? Even Garrus doesn't call you by your first name. It seems kinda… odd."

Shepard knew what she meant. It was normal now for everyone to call her by her last name - for Garrus it was mostly out of habit that compelled him to call her by it - although sometimes she wondered if anyone even knew or remembered her first name.

"I'm pretty sure if they saw my first name they wouldn't even know how to pronounce it."

"How could you not know how to say Aislynn?" She was rewarded with a 'look'.

"It's Irish - from a glance most people would probably say Ay-slynn or Ace-lynn instead of Ash-lynn."

Avalon rolled her eyes, "Trust Mom and Dad to give you a name like that. I mean it's beautiful, but if you have to deal with teaching people how to say it then maybe it's better that everyone calls you Shepard."

Her sister went quiet, "I miss them."

"Me too."

"What do you think they'd make of all this? Of us?" Shepard's eyes flickered to the younger woman, almost as if she was looking for approval.

"They'd be proud of you." The reply was sincere and there was no mistaking the emotional tone that Avalon had adopted. She hadn't really thought about her sister's achievements that much, and while that might sound awful to an adoring Commander Shepard fan, she had always admired her older sister - her accomplishments with the Alliance only reinforced what she already knew: her sister was the most awesome, badass human alive.

"They'd be proud of you too," Shepard said, "Especially Mom. She would have loved seeing you become a doctor like her."

The hum of the drive core soothed their ears as they let a comfortable silence wrap around them, drawing them closer.

"I'm proud of you too, you know." Shepard said quietly, standing up. As if on cue the intercom crackled to life and Joker's voice came through to them, "We're approaching the envoy ship now Commander. The admirals are requesting to come aboard."

"Send them through to the war room Joker."

"Aye, aye ma'am."

The intercom went quiet.

Avalon rose from the seat and hurried to the door, "I'd better go and see if there's anything I can do. Chakwas might have something for me - or maybe," she grinned, "I can go and sort out the calibrations down in the main battery."

Her sister turned from where she was dressing in her brass uniform and smirked, "I seriously doubt Garrus would let you put one finger on those guns."

"We'll see" Avalon smiled sweetly.

"So where are we going and who are we killing?" Avalon didn't think she quite understood the commander's garbled explanation of the plan. Something something - dreadnought - something - upgrades - something something - Reapers - something - Geth - something - this is Tali. Needless to say Shepard had been talking very quickly; introducing her old quarian friend to the doctor in the process.

From underneath her helmet, Tali'Zorah smiled at the sight of the sisters. They appeared so similar and occasionally there were moments like now where they would even sound like each other.

"We're boarding the geth dreadnought," the quarian explained, "We need to get to the main Operations Center so that I can disable the Reaper signal that is transmitting the upgrades to the geth."

Avalon thought for a while, "I'm assuming that you guys have a plan to board that massive thing."

"I'm going to walk across one of the damaged docking tubes so that I can access the docking controls. Once I've done that, you and Tali will accompany me from there." Shepard was determined to see this through; livid at the thought of the quarians starting another war with the geth right in the middle of a Reaper invasion. But she would help them - for Tali's sake as well as Earth's.

The doctor nodded in understanding, "Go do what you do best Ash. We'll just wait here."

There was a satisfying sound of a geth turning it's rifle on another synthetic as Avalon successfully managed to temporarily hack into the platform. Beside her, Shepard and Tali were doing their best to stay shielded from the electrical pulse that was shooting throughout the main battery every few seconds.

"I'm making a break for it - cover me!" The commander yelled as the most recent electric emission pulsed past them; popping out of cover and sprinting forward.

Avalon spied a geth platform that had recovered from overloading aim its rifle at the commander.

"Oh no you don't!" A fist of mass effect slammed into the unit - exploding on impact.

"Nice one, Doctor!" Tali nodded her approval.

The fighting only lasted a few more minutes, Shepard had 'borrowed' one of the missile launchers from a geth who "wouldn't be needing it anymore" and Avalon heard the commander's satisfied exclamations as each missile utterly decimated the synthetic squad.

But then Shepard disappeared and both Tali and Avalon had been too busy engaged with the enemy to notice where she had gone.

"Up here!" They caught sight of her on the upper level, gesturing at the ladder that she had climbed up.

"Watch out!" Tali pulled Avalon back just as a shockwave whizzed past them - making light contact with the doctor's barriers.

"Thanks."

"Don't mention it." The quarian waited for her chance and then gracefully pulled herself up the ladder. Avalon followed closely behind her, although she stumbled on the last rung.

The three of them made their way through a another set of doors, and that was when they saw it. The drive core revealed the geth platform inside of it and as Avalon examined it more carefully she noted the N7 chestplate that was attached to it's body.

"Shepard-Commander."

"Legion?"

Avalon was pissed off. "Fair warning Tali - if we make it off this dreadnought alive then I'm gonna kill this Admiral Gerrel bastard!"

"Not if I kill him first!" Shepard yelled.

They were close to the geth fighters now and Legion had assured them that if they could reach one, he could pilot them back to the Normandy.

But then Shepard fell forward - which upped the intensity of the current objective by 'about a million percent'. Avalon didn't even stop to care that she had just said a mathematically incorrect statement; busy following her sister down to the lower level.

"GO GO GO!" She'd never run so fast in her life and this was evident as she began to lag behind slightly. She was pretty sure that the only thing keeping her standing was the adrenaline that was coursing through her veins. Even the thought of using her nova to blast her way forward again seemed exhausting; this realisation scared her slightly - her doctorate in medicine hadn't been particularly demanding in the way of fitness or gunplay.

Maybe she should undergo some light training after this. If they got out of this. She was going to _kill_ that damn quarian.

They made it - only just. It was almost a relief to hear Joker's sarcastic tone over the comm.

"Just waggle the wings or something so that I know which one is you."

The Normandy's shuttle bay door opened and Legion managed to park the geth fighter as carefully as he could.

It was good to be back on the SR2.

Avalon, Shepard and Tali - exhausted from the mission - trudged across the shuttle bay where they were greeted by a few familiar faces.

Avalon had never been so relieved to see Kaidan in all the time she had known him; collapsing into his arms when her legs gave away. He hugged her tight and kissed the top of her head protectively.

"That was… too close." He said.

"You can say that again," she murmured in reply.


	7. A Crash Course in Just About Everything

Shepard was more angry than she was tired. "I need to have a few words with the Admiral." She fumed, opening the elevator for everyone to clamber into. Kaidan let the doctor lean against him at the back of the elevator. He watched her protectively, noting that her eyes were struggling to stay open.

"Maybe you should go to the crew quarters Av," he whispered. Her eyes snapped open suddenly and she pushed herself back onto her feet, "I will. But first I want to see what Aislynn is gonna do to the Admiral."

Tali snorted, "He might not survive that encounter."

The usually quiet war room was now hosting the familiar voices of Admiral Raan and Admiral Gerrel. Raan didn't seem to be happy with the attack on the dreadnought either.

Shepard, Tali and Avalon swept into the room like a hurricane - silencing the arguing quarians briefly before they returned to their argument with smoke wisps coming off every word.

"The mission parameters changed!" Gerrel protested, glancing at Shepard and Tali cautiously. Avalon stayed behind by the door; Kaidan had caught up and was now with her.

"Shepard you're military, you must understand!"

Even Avalon wasn't expecting such a swift and painful response from her sister - a powerful blow to the quarian's stomach. He almost fell to the ground in shock but instead retreated from the room.

Shepard looked over at her sister, "Lesson number one Avalon: Don't let people take your sacrifices for granted."

Avalon nodded - a bit too quickly - her heart was thrumming in her chest from her sister's sudden boldness. She knew Aislynn was badass but damn, she wasn't prepared to see her beat the crap out of a quarian - an admiral of the flotilla, no less.

Admiral Raan was pleased nonetheless from the destruction of the dreadnought. After going over the next plan of their attack with Shepard now that conflict seemed inevitable, the commander took her leave, preparing to go and take a breather in her cabin or on the crew deck; anywhere that she could kid herself that the war room had magically disappeared and that the tech labs, armoury and comm room were still there - the way they had been when Cerberus built the ship.

When she saw her aquarium after stepping into her quarters she shuddered, remembering her recent visit to the Citadel. Shepard supposed she would always be slightly wary of fish tanks now. It wasn't an idea that she was comfortable with - the first human Spectre, afraid of fish tanks. The other species would just love that.

The commander didn't realise that she had collapsed onto her bed until her terminal pinged from across the room.

Groaning, she got up.

You know the world is messed up when you get a message in the middle of a war and it could either be a message from an allied force or a message from one of your friends asking to meet up at the bar.

It was from Avalon.

 _Ash,_

 _That last mission was pretty intense and being in the middle of the action made me realise just how incompetent I am for military assignments; managed to persuade Vega to spar with me but Kaidan stepped in before we could start - he didn't think it was a good idea to fight the strongest man on the ship as my first exercise. We made a compromise that I'd train with you, him and maybe Liara or Garrus. What do you think?_

 _I'll be in the shuttle bay if you wanna talk about it - Cortez managed to get hold of some old Cerberus armour that the phantoms use from the attempted coup and I'm working on modifying it._

 _Avvy_

Shepard's job was never done it would seem - not that she wasn't open to the idea of giving her sister additional training, in fact she'd been thinking about something along the same lines a little while ago. She was just so tired.

"EDI can you ask Garrus and Liara to meet me down in the shuttle bay?"

"Yes Shepard."

"Thanks."

* * *

She was no expert designer but even Avalon had to admit that her new armour looked good. It was a perfect fit and she'd installed one of her other prototypes into it with little to no complications. It was a biotic amplifier that she had designed specifically to be installed into armour in order to make her barrier more efficient. She couldn't wait to try it out on the field so that she could test out its strength.

"That's looking impressive." Liara T'soni peered over Avalon's shoulder, "I don't recognise the amp, though."

"I designed it." Avalon admitted, "It's no masterpiece but it should be powerful enough to give me a bit of an edge."

Liara smiled at her, "I have to admit Doctor, you are a bit of a mystery."

"From the Shadow Broker, that means a lot."

"You are well informed."

"Am I? It's not really a secret on this ship is it?"

"But you knew _before_ you came onto the ship. Before you even joined our gathering at Purgatory."

Liara used her omni-tool to play a recording. Avalon recognised her voice and cringed - she had obviously been drinking. She only boasted when she was drunk.

" _...and I might not be the Shadow Broker but… I'd say I'm well-informed, don't you?"_

"You recorded that?" She swallowed.

The asari nodded, "Of course. Information is power and sometimes the best information passes right under your nose. It's my job to be prepared for anything."

"And why are you bringing it up now?"

"Because I need to know how you found out about me." Liara's blue eyes were all business now, determined to get the information that she craved. But the human doctor had played this game before with numerous people, and she would not be intimidated so easily.

"A friend told me a few months ago after I helped her out. I mentioned that I needed to contact the Shadow Broker directly and she mentioned you. Then we parted ways."

The asari narrowed her eyes, "The only people who knew about my identity that long ago was Shepard and the crew that was on the Normandy when the Collectors were abducting colonists."

"You met her - she was there when you broke into the Shadow Broker's base."

It clicked.

"Kasumi Goto." Liara realised. Avalon nodded, quickly turning back to her armour and hoping that the conversation would end.

Luckily the elevator opened behind them and Shepard, Kaidan, and Garrus stepped out; heading straight towards the armoury. Avalon joined them with Liara behind her.

"We've got a few training ideas to start you off with," Shepard announced. "Garrus is gonna help you with your marksmanship and tech abilities. Liara is gonna help you fine tune your biotics and Kaidan and I are going to teach you about navigating the battlefield."

Avalon nodded eagerly. This was definitely going to be interesting.

* * *

"Lesson number 2: If in doubt, stay in cover," Shepard instructed to Avalon as they crouched behind shifted cargo crates while Kaidan, Garrus and Liara took their positions in the exercise. They'd managed to make an appropriate area to practice sprinting from cover to cover so that they could progress down the cargo bay while the other three shot practice rounds at them. Behind Kaidan was the objective - a makeshift flag that consisted of Vega's shirt. Off to the side, James was smirking as he watched - shirtless - the scene play out in front of him.

The crates were stacked high enough that Avalon and Shepard couldn't be seen until they popped out of cover and even then they could avoid being seen as long as they stayed as low as possible. "What's our next move?" Avalon whispered, holding her SMG closely. Her newly modified armour was giving her a new wave of confidence and she admitted that in an exercise like this when she was working with Shepard to outsmart the other crew members, the new uniform helped a lot.

"You're the one who needs to get to the flag," Shepard decided, "So I'm going to draw their attention by doing a mad run towards it - they've seen how I fight and they'll be expecting it. While they're focused on me, you sneak your way around the left side of the field and keep as low as you can."

"And if that doesn't work?"

"Improvise."

Shepard peered around the cover. She could see Kaidan and Liara positioned back to back but she couldn't find Garrus, although that didn't surprise her. No doubt he had found himself a sniper perch that was close enough to the flag that he could keep an eye on it but low enough to stay in cover - maybe in one of the far corners of the room.

 _It's now or never_. Pistol in hand, she took her shots at Liara before charging forward with determined grace. Just as she had predicted, both the asari and Kaidan began to focus on her - favouring the defensive by creating a biotic barrier in front of them. If she ran into that thing then she'd get slammed backwards pretty badly. But Shepard kept running, firing her pistol at it and letting some of her tech hammer it down a bit. She was fifteen metres away at least but still she braced herself for an unpleasant impact. Just in case.

Meanwhile, Avalon had taken Shepard's advice and decided to play it safe - lowering herself onto her stomach, she crawled across the first gap of cover, marvelling at how well her strategy was working. When she had managed to get to the next line of cover behind more crates, she got back to her feet; crouching low while she listened to the shots that her sister was firing off and the familiar WHOOM sound as the bullets bounced off a biotic barrier. Avalon peeked over the top of the crates, taking note of the distance to Kaidan and Liara.

Shepard was just about to have a head-on collision with the barrier but she'd developed a plan. The barrier exploded, propelling her, Liara and Kaidan off their feet and in all directions. She grunted in pain as her head collided with the crates behind her. Judging from the surprised yells of Kaidan and Liara it would seem that they had been treated the same way.

Avalon took the opportunity to pop out of cover and sprint past the asari and the human biotic who were sprawled across the floor, gasping and groaning. There were at least twenty metres of ground to cover in order to reach the flag and this was when her endurance was going to factor in on her objective. Keeping her breathing as balanced as possible she quickly covered the distance; stopping at the flag's base and taking deep, triumphant breaths.

Until she remembered Garrus.

The turian sharpshooter tackled her - attempting to do this as carefully as he could without seriously hurting her - and she gasped as she was thrown onto her back and forced to wrestle with him. And then her biotics came into play. The weight of his body pinning hers down was enough to remind her of the same feeling she'd had in Purgatory when that batarian bastard had grabbed her. It gave her the same feeling of rage.

Garrus didn't stand a chance, although he put up a good fight. With her new biotic strength to help her out, Avalon managed to throw him off of her with a good ol' biotic fist in the chest and for good measure, she wrapped him in a stasis. Satisfied that he was no longer going to be a problem, Avalon returned her attention to the flag, untying it and lifting it above her head with a wide grin.

"Can I have my shirt back now Isabela?" James called out to her and she laughed, throwing it in his direction and clicking her fingers to end the stasis hold on the turian behind her.

She offered Garrus a hand up and he took it, amused.

"I can't decide whether to be amazed at your biotics or annoyed that I forgot about them." He told her as they made their way towards the other three who had gathered by the armoury again.

"Can't you be both?"

The turian considered this, "I suppose. Although it's gonna take a while before I let myself forget _that_ amateur mistake.

"It was an easy thing to forget," Avalon argued.

"But in this war, I can't afford to make mistakes - neither can Shepard and neither can you. It's brutal but it's the truth. One mistake and the entire galaxy suffers. One mistake and everyone dies."

They'd reached the armoury now and it was clear the others had heard Garrus. They all shared a look: one mixed with despair, comfort, and fear.

Avalon's eyes darkened, "I guess we'd better not make mistakes then."

* * *

 **Author's Note: Hello! If you're still with me then thank you for being patient. School has been rather hectic and it's been difficult squeezing time in for writing but I really appreciate sticking with the story despite all of this :) Please remember to follow the story if you're enjoying it and thank you to those that already have! Also, I love getting reviews so if you have the time I would love to read any advice or feedback you might have!**


	8. The Rage Of Little Sister Shepard

**AN: I'm so sorry it's been so long since the last update and for how short this chapter is.**

 **I am planning on updating again either this week or next week - so just bear with me! Again I want to thank you for sticking around and for all the follows and favourites, it really does mean the world to me. Now without further ado: the next chapter!**

* * *

 _A few hours later…_

"What do you mean I'm not coming?" Avalon exclaimed in dismay as Shepard's eyes held their gaze firmly with her own.

"There are gonna be a hell of geth down on Rannoch Avy," her sister said, "And there is absolutely no way I'm letting you loose down there."

"I'm not completely defenseless you know." Avalon shot back, "I have my biotics and we just did all of that training together - what was the point of that if you don't trust me to fight?"

"This isn't up for discussion. You are staying put. End of story." Shepard turned away from her sister with Garrus and Tali at her side and headed towards the shuttle; Avalon following closely behind, fuming.

Glaring as her sister and teammates loaded into the shuttle; her mind was absolutely spinning and she felt as if she was going to be consumed by an inferno of frustration.

"This is because of what happened to Mom and Dad _isn't it?_ " She yelled. "You think that I'm going to die just like they did and then you'll have to blame yourself forever."

Shepard froze and her eyes flashed with fear and hurt at the cold reminder of Mindoir. Avalon knew she shouldn't feel satisfied but she did - finally, her sister was listening.

"I get it," She said quietly, "You don't want me to die. But I don't want me to die either. Neither does Kaidan. I have a lot of things to fight for Ash. To live for after this war is over. And I plan to fight for them, no matter what you say."

For a moment it looked as though Shepard might say something but then Garrus called out to her and the moment was gone.

"We'll talk about this later."

"Yes, ma'am," Avalon muttered moodily under her breath.

* * *

EDI was analysing human behaviour. Again.

"URGH!" Avalon slammed her fist against the airlock on the bridge and afterwards winced in pain. After the shuttle had left she'd found herself wandering around the ship - stopping on every floor to try and keep her mind off of what had just happened with Shepard. But every ounce of rage and fear and despair had finally exploded - hence why her knuckles were now bleeding.

The A.I behind her watched, intrigued as the scene unfolded. She leaned over towards Joker and the pilot couldn't help but be slightly taken aback by how fascinated she seemed to be with Avalon's emotional display.

"What is it EDI?"

"I have made another observation about human behavior, Jeff."

"Yeah? And what would that be?"

"When a human portrays signs of being enraged - like Doctor Avalon - they strike out and behave recklessly, which results in that person injuring themselves from an action that they would not normally do."

"Yeah, well as a person who risks breaking a bone every time he moves, I can't really have angry teenager outbursts."

EDI looked at him, "But humans need to frequently convey their emotions with others in order to remain mentally stable - how do you 'let it all out'?

"Sometimes I'll-"

"DAMN THEM ALL! WHY IS SHE SO BLOODY STUBBORN ALL THE TIME?" Joker almost jumped out of his seat, not realising just how close the doctor was behind his chair. He collected himself; unsure of what to do next. When he saw EDI open her mouth to address Avalon he gestured for her to be quiet.

"Do _not_ give her a lecture about Shepard's inherited traits - it'll just make it worse," He hissed. The artificial intelligence stopped herself just in time - continuing to work at her station while thinking of possible solutions.

Joker cleared his throat, "Ha, um... I'm just gonna take a guess and say that you're pissed off about something, Doc." Avalon stomped around to the side of the pilot's chair so that she was between him and EDI.

"The _commander_ and I are not seeing eye to eye about my purpose on the Normandy."

"That's just a fancy way of saying your sister isn't letting you do whatever you want." Joker quipped, making the doctor scoff.

"I just want to fight alongside her and she won't let me."

EDI joined in, "I believe Shepard only stated that she did not want to take you with her to Rannoch to fight hostile geth when you have very little experience fighting them."

"But that doesn't mean I can't kill them! She's down on that planet right now with no biotic support - my biotic barrier might be the difference between her dying or staying alive."

"It's out of our hands now Av," A voice said behind her. It was his voice. Kaidan stood beside her and put a reassuring hand around her waist. "We just have to trust that Shepard will get back in one piece."

"Just because you'd give up easily doesn't mean I will!" she snapped, pulling away from him and storming away back towards the elevator. She smashed her hand into the elevator controls, intent on heading back down to the shuttle bay to suit up.

Meanwhile, Kaidan was still trying to wrap his head around the whole thing.

"What just happened?" he asked, dazed. Joker laughed, "I think we just unearthed a bit of the 'renegade' in Shepard's little sis."

"She is currently heading towards the shuttle bay. Now that I have studied her behaviour more thoroughly, it would seem most likely that she is about to express extreme signs of anger and frustration within close proximity of the (well-equipped) armoury - would you like me to stop the elevator, Major?"

Kaidan shook his head, "I got this. Can you patch me into the intercom system that's in the elevator? Just the one in the elevator, not the entire ship."

"Of course, Major Alenko. Patching you in now."

He cleared his throat, "Avvy?"

"Don't talk to me."

Not the answer he was hoping for. "I know you were hoping that everything was gonna fall in place with Shepard once you'd met her-"

"That's not it!" the comm interrupted, "I was prepared to be understanding - hell I am understanding - we're in a war and we don't need things to be complicated any more than they already are. I asked for training and now she thinks that I can't handle geth! Of all things. I mean why did we even bother if-"

"Do you want to have dinner together?"

"I'm sorry? It sounded like you just asked me out in the middle of my rant, but that can't be right because you don't have a death wish." Kaidan sighed, he'd had a plan but it didn't involve talking over the elevator intercom.

"I was going to ask you before on the bridge but you kinda stormed off before I got the chance."

There was a pause.

"I just realised how childish I've been," she admitted after a few seconds. It sounded as if she was about to burst out laughing at any second.

"Just a little," he replied with a slight smirk.

"I guess dinner would be a good way to cool down from all of... this. What do you have in mind? Cuisine on a starship isn't exactly going to be flashy."

"Leave it to me. I'll sort something out." He promised, "Meet me in the crew quarters in about an hour?"

"Okay…" the comm went silent for good. Kaidan let out a breath filled with relief. "I'm glad that's sorted out," he muttered.

"Major, I have a confession to make," EDI chirped. He turned, "What is it?"

"I patched you into the intercom on the third, fourth and fifth levels as well as the elevator."

Kaidan felt his cheeks flush, "You mean almost the entire crew just heard all that?"

EDI remained silent.

"Please tell me you're joking? This is a joke, right? EDI?"

"I am sorry, Major Alenko. Jeff 'dared' me to do it."

Kaidan glared at the pilot accusingly, "You didn't?"

Joker grinned.

Kaidan scowled at the pair of them; his face getting redder and redder until he spun around and started walking - giving up entirely on getting any of his dignity back. If everyone had heard the conversation then... _Honestly,_ he thought to himself, _With Joker around, I'm always nervous I'm gonna be unable to resist going full biotic on someone._ "

It was only when he was out of earshot that EDI stated, "That was a joke."


	9. Dinner With An Ulterior Motive

Avalon didn't know whether or not she was evil or just a manipulative bitch when she got fucked off. All she knew is that the moment Kaidan suggested dinner, her mind instantly started flashing the word 'OPPORTUNITY' in bright colours. All she needed to do was ask a few questions while batting her eyelashes at him and then BAM! She'd have all the answers she wanted about the Rannoch mission so that she could go down and find her sister's squad.

All she had to do was dress to impress.

Luckily she had remembered to pack all of her clothes with her: including her clubbing dresses and skirts. She took the elevator down to Engineering - where she had decided to make herself comfortable down on the lower levels when she had first had the option to choose where to crash.

She opened her footlocker and rummaged through the contents; throwing various dresses here and there in an attempt to find 'the one'. Then she scoffed at the idea that she was getting all worked up at the idea of trying to pick a dress that would distract Kaidan long enough to extract the information she wanted and leave.

But then she found it and after she slipped it on and matched it with her silver heels, she had to admit that she felt dangerous - sexy even. A blood red one-shoulder dress hugged her curves and showed off her long, pale legs; Avalon remembered how she had modified the length of it when she had bought it by shortening the hem by a few inches so that the fabric ended around 6 inches above her knees - when Kaidan saw her he'd have a heart attack.

She did her best to apply what little makeup she had managed to scrape together - mascara, eyeliner and a hint of eyeshadow; paired with a little concealer and finished with some bold red lipstick. If her plan was going to work then she would have to play her best cards.

This was going to be child's play.

* * *

"Hey." Avalon stepped into the crew's quarters and prepared her smile; bracing herself for Kaidan's reaction. Her stomach like a big knotted playground for butterflies, and she had never felt so uncomfortable in her life. The elevator ride up to deck had helped sink in what she was about to do and now here she was, waltzing into the crew deck to meet Kaidan while she drowned herself in guilt. Maybe she really was evil after all.

"Woah!" Kaidan breathed in, taking in all of her beauty that had just stunned him and left him with an electric current that shot through his body. He'd been too busy cooking what provisions he had left from his time on the Citadel to worry about changing his outfit but now that he saw Avalon dolled up and looking - to borrow a term from Vega - _smokin'_ , he wished he'd made the effort.

"Is it too much?" the doctor asked, "I didn't know what this was going to be like so I just thought-"

"It's perfect," He said quickly, and their eyes met. " _You're_ perfect."

Avalon might as well have been punched in the face. He really had no idea what she was planning. Of course, he didn't - he trusted that she had calmed down; that she wasn't going to do anything rash; that she wasn't taking advantage of his feelings towards her.

She was such a fucking bitch.

Kaidan gestured to the meal that he had served on the table and she made her way over to him carefully and watched with guilty eyes as he pulled the seat out for her and waited for her to sit down. He sat across from her, watching eagerly as she took in the food that was served before her.

"It's roast beef with yorkshire pudding - my mom's recipe actually. Back on Earth, my entire family used to get together on a Sunday and have this." Kaidan said, reaching for the wine bottle that was in the middle of the table.

"I wanted to give you a completely Canadian dinner but they didn't have any ice cider so we're gonna have to make do with batarian shard wine."

Avalon faked her annoyance, smiling, "You have some nerve to sit a lady down to dinner and demand that she 'make do'."

Kaidan laughed, pouring them both a glass of the light blue liquid. "Really? Good thing you're not a lady then," She gave him a kick from under the table and they both laughed.

He watched her curiously, with golden brown eyes that melted her heart, "You know, my life flashed in front of my eyes on Mars and… there weren't enough moments like this - with people I care about."

Avalon tried her best not to look away and maintain eye contact but felt her gaze slipping with each second that passed.

She raised her wine glass, "To us."

"To us." After clinking their glasses, she took a sip of the sweet blue liquid that trickled down her throat. Damn, it was good. But then she had to remind herself that she couldn't get too drunk because otherwise, she'd be as good as dead when she got to Rannoch.

She started on her food, chewing delicately and enjoying the flavours that spread across her tongue, "It's good." she said, aware of how surprised she sounded.

"I'm glad you improve," he replied, setting down his wineglass and reaching for her free hand that was resting on the table; grasping it gently with his own warm fingers, "Because I plan to cook for you for a long time."

The worst thing about her plan was that it made all of his attempts to romance her feel annoying and obstructive to her goal - which she hated. Avalon didn't hate him, in fact, it was quite the opposite - she loved how sweet and sensitive Kaidan was. It just had to be tonight of all nights that he really turned up the charm.

Maybe she could just give on her plan and enjoy the night. That's what a normal person with a soul would do. But Shepard needed her, she could feel it; something bad was going to happen and she needed to be with her sister when it did. Which only made her attitude towards Kaidan right now feel even worse.

She smiled sweetly, "Thanks for calming down - I really needed this. It's nice to have a sanity check every once and awhile."

"It's the least I could do. You've undergone a lot of changes recently; I'm just glad I could help you cope with the more stressful ones." he paused, "Listen Av, I want you to know - I'm here for you, no matter what. I know we haven't known each other a very long time and with the war it makes this sort of thing feel rushed and complicated but…. I wanna be with you." he sighed.

"That's what I want - what do you want?"

There was the opportunity. She snatched at it with both hands.

"I'll admit, I've pictured us having this conversation ever since you offered to be my date at Purgatory so that I would have an excuse to talk to my sister." This was the truth - it was the least Avalon felt she could do, given the circumstances.

"When I told you about my past, about Mindoir and… what the batarians did to me - you listened and you didn't judge me and honestly, that was the one thing I'd been looking forever since my parents died. For someone to listen. And- damn, this sounded better in my head." she admitted, aware of how awkward she sounded. Kaidan squeezed her hand reassuringly.

"Whatever you have to say can't sound more awkward than what I said." he told her with a slight smile.

She took a deep breath, "Kaidan Alenko. When I first came to the Citadel I wanted to die. Then I became a doctor and it seemed like I had a purpose. But it's only now that I've met you in the middle of a galactic war where we could lose everything that I suddenly feel the urge to live and to survive. You made me feel alive again - as cheesy as that sounds, it's true - so thank you."

"Did you just rhyme?" Kaidan joked, raising her hand to plant a light kiss on the back of it, "Does that count as serenading me?"

"I don't think so," she winked, "I didn't sing any of it so I don't think it does."

"We'll have to ask Shepard when she gets back." he said.

" _If_ she gets back." Avalon quipped, "I don't even know what she's doing down on Rannoch but suddenly everyone expects me to believe that she'll get back in one piece." The venom from her previous outburst on the bridge had started to return and she bit her tongue, forcing down the word vomit that was slowly making it's way to her lips.

"They were going to the Reaper base on Rannoch on foot because the geth have set up a bunch of jamming towers so that we can't use an orbital strike on the base. I think one of the Admiral's gave Shepard's ground team a targeting laser so that she can set the target manually."

"But how would they even get to the base? Won't there be like AA guns preventing the shuttle from getting close?"

Kaidan studied her carefully, "We disabled them - remember?"

Avalon froze. Of course, she remembered - Kaidan was the one who had accompanied Shepard and Tali on that mission when they rescued Admiral Koris.

Kaidan leaned forward, concern showing on his face, "Are you okay Av? You seem a little… tense."

"I'm… I'm fine. Just worried."

He took a deep breath and opened up an application on his omni-tool, "Look - when the Alliance prepared Shepard's new armour they decided to place a tracker on it, just to be safe. But the tracker doesn't just monitor her location - it also monitors her pulse."

Her blood boiled. The Alliance still hadn't trusted Shepard when they brought her back into the fold. Hackett and Anderson might have but none of the others did. They'd just decided to keep her tagged and collared without her knowing. But it wasn't the time to cause a scene right now - she needed that tracker. Now.

"Do you think… do you think you could forward me that software?" she implored, hoping that her feminine wiles were working. It was likely that only the high ranking officers of the Alliance could access that sort of software.

"Normally, I'd say no," He admitted, and Avalon's face fell.

"But," he said, "I'd say given the circumstances, you have the right to track whether or not your sister is alive or not," she gave him a winning smile.

"Thank you, Kaidan. I mean it."

"Now for God's sakes, let's eat before the food goes cold."

"Bon appetite," she replied, thinking forward to the next stage of her plan. She had what she needed - with the tracker on her omni-tool she'd be able to pinpoint her sister's location within minutes.

Now all she had to do was 'borrow' the geth fighter that was in the shuttle bay.

* * *

 _ **Just needed to mention that yes, I did borrow some dialogue from the dinner scene that was written originally for Shepard and Kaidan on the Citadel. All rights go to BioWare and it's writers. Thank you for reading :)**_


	10. How To Screw Things Up, by Dr Shepard

**_So basically because I wanted to keep the Rannoch mission as genuine as possible I did end up reusing the dialogue from the actual game. All rights go to BioWare and it's writers apart from the stuff involving Avalon. Enjoy :)_**

* * *

Taking the geth fighter was going to have it's consequences but Avalon was too busy trying to land the damn thing safely on Rannoch to care that much about the manner in which she came to find herself driving it. Cortez and Vega had seen her, and she was pretty sure a few other Normandy crewmen had been gawking at the scene as well. If she was lucky she'd be able to find Shepard before word got to Joker or EDI to warn the commander that she was coming.

She landed the fighter on what seemed to be just a long runway which looked over into the valley below. The first thing she noticed when she stepped out with her pistol ready was the lack of geth; true she had chosen this spot because it seemed to be quiet but she had assumed that there would be a few scouts of some sort. That was when she heard it.

The Reaper.

* * *

Kaidan had just finished cleaning the dishes from the dinner he and Avalon had shared when Cortez approached him with a concerned frown.

"Cortez? What's-"

"The doctor's gone."

"Who, Chakwas? She's probably in the crew quarters." But the shuttle pilot was shaking his head, "No. Not Chakwas - Avalon. She took the geth fighter that was in the shuttle bay and-"

Kaidan couldn't believe it, "Tell Joker to send word to Shepard."

"James is already on it," said Cortez, "But Shepard's got her own problems too."

"What do you mean?"

Cortez looked away. Then the intercom crackled to life. It was Joker.

"Hey everyone? Not to alarm you or anything but just wanted to tell you - that Reaper base that Shepard set out to destroy? It's a Reaper. Just thought you might wanna know in case you find yourself feeling slightly hotter than usual - in a 'Reaper laser is melting my face off' kind of way."

With dread seeping through his veins, Kaidan ran towards the elevator.

* * *

"MOVE!" Shepard roared. Her team had been flat out sprinting from the Reaper for what seemed like an age and she didn't want to lose any ground - if that was even possible when she considered that they were up against a Reaper.

"How are we supposed to fight that thing!" Tali wheezed.

"I was hoping your fleet might lend a hand!" Shepard responded through sharp breaths.

"Aislynn!" The commander's eyes widened as she noticed for the first time the figure that was standing with her pistol drawn at the monstrous sentient machine that was edging its way towards them with massive strides.

Avalon. Of course she was here. Of course she was fucking here.

"I TOLD YOU TO STAY ON THE NORMANDY!" Shepard thundered, as she grabbed her sister and threw her onto the transport that Legion had managed to get a hold of; taking charge of the turret.

"We will attempt evasive maneuvers," Legion informed them all.

Shepard let hell loose in the form of bullets, but she realised deep down that it was going to take more than just peppering the damn thing with a turret to take it down.

"Shepard to Fleet - it's not a Reaper base, it's a _live Reaper._ I need an orbital strike - NOW!"

"An orbital strike is never gonna work while it's chasing us!" Avalon yelled over the comm.

She was right, although Shepard wouldn't admit it. Admitting it would make her sister think that sneaking off the Normandy was justified, which it wasn't.

Shepard didn't know how he did it but Legion managed to get enough room between them and the Reaper that it was safe enough for the Fleet to attack.

"We're clear!" Shepard yelled over the comm, "Fire at will!"

 **BOOM. BOOM. BOOM.**

They watched with satisfaction as the machine collapsed under the impact of the strike.

"What did we hit?" Admiral Gerrel asked the commander anxiously.

Shepard observed the enemy with expert eyes - not that it would take an expert to figure where the strike had hurt the machine the most.

"The firing chamber - looks like a weak point when it's priming."

"Damn it." Gerrel swore on the other side of the comm, "The jamming towers have us targeting manually - we can't make a precision shot."

"We may escape before it recovers," Legion stated.

And then what? Shepard asked herself. It would recover and then set up a base on the planet again and ask for assistance from the others of its kind. They would never liberate the geth from Reaper control if they didn't destroy it and if that meant taking it head on then so be it.

"No!" she snapped at the geth, "Pull over!"

She heard Avalon gasp, "You can't be serious Ash!"

"I can use the targeting laser to help the Fleet make a precision strike."

"And you're going to do that how exactly?" her sister argued, "That _thing_ is gonna be firing at you the moment it recovers. How are you going to stay still long enough to target it?"

"I'll find a way."

"We'll find a way."

It was just as well Shepard couldn't see her little sister or else she might have hit her.

"You've already pissed me off with this stunt Avalon - there is absolutely no fucking way I'm going to let you face a Reaper."

"And there's _absolutely no fucking way_ that I'm going to let you go to your death because you're too proud to admit that I'm right about this."

"Shepard-Commander."

Shepard sighed as she leaped onto the dirt and turned to face the fighter, "If we run away then the geth stay under Reaper control and the quarians are dead." She turned to face the Reaper pile, "This ends now! EDI, patch the quarians to the Normandy's weapon system. I want the targeting laser synced up to the whole damn fleet."

"Understood" EDI replied.

"Do you need assistance?" Legion asked.

Shepard shook her head, "Just stay down Legion and I'll take it from here."

Avalon watched as the geth said, "Shepard-Commander? Good luck."

Her sister's reply ripped right through her like a whirlwind.

"Acknowledged."

"NO!" Avalon screamed.

"Garrus." Shepard implored desperately, before focusing on the rapidly recovering Reaper..

* * *

"LET GO OF ME YOU TURIAN BASTARD!" Avalon screeched at the top of her voice, while Garrus did his best to restrain her. She knew he just wanted to help; that Shepard was just doing what she thought was best. But this was her life and her choice. If she wanted to throw her life away against the Reaper then that seemed as good a cause as any.

It was a full biotic kick, almost as powerful as the one she had unleashed on that leering batarian back at the club and definitely more powerful than the one she had used against Garrus during the training exercise in the shuttle bay.

It was enough for him to hesitate and that was all she needed him to do. A few seconds hesitation left her with just enough time to leap out of the fighter which had already begun to move again.

Shepard was up in front of her and Avalon almost let out a laugh when she saw what her sister's big plan was. Running from side to side.

"If that's your overall plan then I'm almost sorry that I followed you; it's kind of embarrassing," she called out. Shepard froze from running to the left of the Reaper's laser like a rabbit caught in headlights.

"Watch out!" Avalon threw her clear of the laser with a biotic fist and Shepard landed on her back - her head narrowly missing crashing into the cliff behind her. Grumbling, the commander got to her feet.

"You're welcome," Avalon smirked.

"The laser!" Shepard said suddenly, "Where's the targeting laser?"

Oh shit.

"Uhh…" Avalon stuttered. Oh shit. Oh shit oh shit oh shit oh shit oh-

"AVVY!" Suddenly it was her turn to be tackled to one side as the Reaper began shooting a line directly in front of her.

"Ouch." Her new armour hadn't stopped the dirt and gravel from scraping up the left side of her face but Shepard ignored her. The commander was absolutely livid. By herself, she at least had the targeting laser but now it was gone - probably cast off the cliff when Avalon threw her clear of that first initial beam.

"I HOPE YOU'RE HAPPY WITH YOURSELF!" the commander yelled as her sister got to her feet and prepared for the next attack. When she heard Shepard's voice, Avalon turned and glared.

"IF YOU HAD JUST LET ME COME WITH YOU-"

"YOU WOULD HAVE BEEN KILLED BY THE THREE GETH PRIMES THAT WE STUMBLED INTO."

Another laser beam shot between the two of them and they jumped apart.

"I COULD HAVE HANDLED IT IF YOU'D JUST GIVEN ME THE CHANCE."

"Shepard?" It was Joker. "What the hell is happening down there? EDI says that the targeting laser is inactive."

"WE KIND OF LOST IT, JOKER!"

Avalon dived to the right as the laser headed towards her and Shepard winced as Joker processed what she had just said.

"What do you mean _you lost it?_ "

"IT MEANS THAT I SCREWED UP!" Avalon bellowed into Shepard's ear so that the comm could pick her voice up.

"Is that Avalon?" Joker asked, sounding surprised. "EDI, patch her in."

"Shepard?" It was Gerrel talking now, "The fleet is waiting for the coordinates of the strike."

"There's been a bit of a complication Admiral," Joker replied for her.

"Ash, get ready!" Avalon warned as the Reaper sent another beam shooting across the cliff. Shepard dodged it and then turned her attention back to the conversation at hand. "So what do we do Joker? There is absolutely no way we can take that thing down with the orbital strike."

"Okay, hang on." There was a silence and then, "Are you positive that the laser is gone?"

"It went over the cliff. URGH!" Avalon tried to dive roll but it ended messily and she landed heavily on her head. She probably should have practised that first. Another thing to add on to her list of regrets.

"Maybe it got caught on something on the way down. Can one of you check?"

"ON IT!" Shepard yelled, running towards the edge of the cliff and throwing herself at it so that her entire body slid on her front; head looking over the drop below.

"Shepard?" Avalon prompted, glancing over to see what her sister was doing.

"I see it!" the commander answered, "But it's too far away for me to reach."

"I can do it!" her little sister yelled. This time, when Shepard faced her, their eyes met and Avalon saw her older sister's expression. Belief.

"Whatever you've gotta do - do it fast!" Shepard said, "And be careful."

"I promise." There was one biotic trick she hadn't used just yet but she'd been practising it for years - ever since she saw an asari C-Sec officer do it. She took a deep breath and stood at the edge of the cliff, letting the dark energy wash over her; spreading all the way to her fingertips and down to her toes.

The world all seemed to slow down and all she could hear was her heartbeat and the blood rushing through her body like a roaring current.

Focus.

Focus.

She jumped, letting the energy envelope her as she did so. Below her she caught sight of the targeting laser and she resisted the urge to let her biotics carry her down the side of the cliff faster. Focus, she breathed. The Reaper hadn't caught sight of her just yet and for that she was grateful; she just hoped that it hadn't gotten to her sister just yet.

She landed gracefully on a small platform made of rock that was jutted out from the rest of the cliff and she quickly scooped up the laser in her arms.

"I'VE GOT IT ASH!" She looked up and saw her sister's face peering over the cliff about eight metres up.

"Can you get back up?" Shepard asked her.

"Let's find out!"

Avalon had never tried to fly using her biotics before; she hadn't thought it was possible. She knew that her biotics could be harnessed like a parachute and allow her to glide and hover, but even the asari had never been able to fly - or if they had then they'd kept it under wraps pretty efficiently.

But at the same time, she didn't really need to make herself fly. She just needed to jump at least eight metres up - to meet Shepard's outstretched arm.

She gathered up all of her remaining strength…. and she jumped.

She almost didn't make it but by some miracle, Shepard managed to grab her wrist and pull her up; quickly taking hold of the targeting laser and aiming it at the Reaper.

EDI's voice broke the comm silence.

"The destroyer is in range; missiles are ready for launch." **BOOM.** For a moment Shepard thought it would collapse again but it managed to stay standing.

"IT'S GETTING CLOSER!" Avalon yelled, diving to one side and landing on the left side of her face again and feeling fresh blood bubble to the surface of her forehead.

Shepard held her ground and pointed the laser at it again with a fierce determination as the familiar sound of it locking onto the target reached her ears.

 **BOOM.**

Suddenly the machine took another huge stride towards the sisters and Shepard felt as if time had slowed down as she took aim and prepared for the final shot.

 **BOOM.**


	11. Hackett In, Hackett Out

Admiral Hackett wasn't happy. He'd read the reports on Rannoch and it sounded as if this 'Doctor Avalon' had almost messed up everything. He needed to talk to Commander Shepard and get everything all sorted out before word got out to the rest of the galaxy of the Alliance's recent 'unprofessionalism'.

Shepard appeared in front of him though the QEC and saluted him, "You wanted to speak with me, Admiral?"

Hackett nodded, "Yeah I did. You mentioned in your report about 'Doctor Avalon'? It sounds like she risked the entire mission."

Shepard frowned for a second and for a moment contemplated agreeing with him. But she realised that if she started complaining about her sister, Avalon would end up getting kicked off of the Normandy; no matter how much she might have disagreed with what her sister did, Shepard couldn't do that.

"The report is probably a little one sided, sir." she said, "When I wrote it I was annoyed and irritated with her and that anger rubbed off on the report. What she did was nothing I couldn't handle and what's important is we managed to get the job done." It was Hackett's turn to frown now; he had never known Shepard to cover up for anyone like this before but whatever it was she was hiding he didn't ask. The rumours about the commander still being with Cerberus had already gotten under her skin and he didn't want to make her feel like he doubted her judgement when it was so important for everyone to believe in her.

"Anyway, regardless of that little problem; I wanted to congratulate you on the alliance that you've made between the geth and the quarians. I don't know how you did it but I'm damn glad you did - we're gonna need all the help we can get." He didn't smile - he never smiled, but Shepard knew that he was pleased with her.

"The asari councillor has asked me to meet her on the Citadel." She informed him, "I think she might have an idea about where the Catalyst is."

The admiral nodded again, as if deep in thought, "Good. Keep me posted. _Hackett out._ "

Shepard sighed as his image disappeared and she was left staring into space - literally. Until the voice behind her made her entire body cringe.

"Hackett _in_ , Hackett _out,_ Hackett _shake it all about!_ " Avalon sang with a large grin. Shepard turned and just stared at her, "Are you always so _hilarious_?" the commander asked, voice dripping with sarcasm.

"Only when the need arises - does he always do that?"

Shepard was confused, "Do what?"

Avalon crossed her arms and put on a gruff voice, "Keep me _posted_. Hackett out!" Her older sister had to refrain from face-palming.

"It's just what he does. It is standard communication protocol." she explained, "Does it really matter?"

Avalon shrugged, "Not really, although personally, I'd prefer if he danced the hokey pokey before he signed out - much more entertaining."

"Maybe you should ask Kaidan if he'd do it." Just the thought of the newly promoted major dancing the hokey pokey made the commander snigger. Avalon looked offended, "Maybe I will. He'd be great at it."

"Have you ever _seen_ him dance?"

"He can't be any worse than you." They smiled together; releasing all of the tension that they had let build up since their argument in the shuttle bay. That seemed so long ago.

"So… we're good now right?" Avalon asked carefully, "I mean, I've proved that I can handle myself under stressful conditions and now we can carry on with life?"

Shepard thought about it, "Well it's kind of obvious by now that I can't keep you away from the action, and I'd rather be there to watch over you from the beginning then have you running into the middle of a Reaper fight."

Avalon let out a big _WHOOP_ and then quickly covered her mouth with her hands. "Sorry!" she whispered, "I swear I wasn't like this as a professional doctor!" Shepard laughed, "Whatever. Go do me a favour and check in with Chakwas at the med-bay; see if she needs anything when we go to the Citadel." Avalon smiled and headed down the stairs but suddenly stumbled and fell down towards the war assets terminal; managing to stay upright by reaching out and pulling herself back up after a few seconds.

The commander watched and at the sight of her sister falling, gave a sharp intake of breath.

"Maybe you should ask Doctor Chakwas to check on your head as well - you might have a concussion," Avalon shook her head, "I'm fine. I just tripped." Shepard didn't believe her but her the doctor had turned away, humming under her breath as she walked back to the war room and out into the former tech lab.

* * *

Kaidan had been waiting frantically for an opportunity to talk to Avalon ever since the Rannoch ground team returned. He'd been waiting for them on the shuttle bay when everyone had tumbled out and the doctor seemed to be unharmed apart from a bloody graze that had dribbled down the side of her face. He would have rushed to her side at that very moment but then he caught sight of Shepard and suddenly he was rewarded with the dreaded 'look' and he'd reluctantly retreated back to his room on the observation deck.

But now that everything had been smoothed over with the Alliance and Admiral Hackett, Kaidan's urge to see Avalon had quickly been reignited. He supposed that the doctor would be back in the med-bay by now with Chakwas - perhaps getting her head patched up while she was there as well.

When Kaidan entered the and saw Avalon lying down on one of the beds his heart dropped and he rushed to her side. Breathing a sigh of relief when he saw her eyelids flutter as he approached, he turned to face Doctor Chakwas who was reading her monitor with a confused expression that was growing more intense with every word read.

"What the hell happened Doc?" He demanded, casting his eyes back in Avalon's direction. The young redhead looked physically fine aside from being a bit paler than usual. Had she picked up a bug? He quickly dismissed the idea - Avalon had been fine during dinner although he'd noted privately to himself that she had come across as a bit uncomfortable; he hoped he hadn't scared her off with his confession, even when she had confessed her feelings to him.

Chakwas was still frowning, "I'm not entirely sure, Major. She came in about ten minutes ago on Shepard's request to see if there was anything I needed but then she just fainted. I thought that maybe it was just physical exhaustion or mental stress from facing that Reaper but these readings look completely ordinary."

Kaidan wasn't convinced. Medical equipment was known to be glitchy or inaccurate; Avalon couldn't have just collapsed for no reason. Unless…

"Her biotics - have you checked her amp? Or her implants?" He got out his omni-tool to do his own readings but Chakwas was already nodding, "Of course. Her amp is stone cold; that's the confusing part. Before she collapsed she was telling me about how she'd managed to use her biotics to hover down a cliff and then to carry her back up roughly ten metres."

Kaidan rubbed the back of his neck, worriedly, "Her amp should be boiling after doing something like that. Something's not right here Doc."

The older doctor nodded in agreement, "It might be better if we take her to Huerta Memorial when we dock again at the Citadel."

"Again?" Kaidan asked, "But we only just got her discharged - and even that was early."

"And you'll recall that it was also a biotic related injury that made her wind up there in the first place." Chakwas reminded him, "In fact, now that you mention it I remember hearing her say that she had prototype L6 implants that she had designed herself."

He nodded slowly, "It's why she's able to manipulate much more powerful mass effect fields in the past. That and the amp that she designed."

"The amp that is completely indifferent, after its user just managed to biotically jump ten metres up."

"So you think it's down to her designs." Kaidan realised. Avalon had always been so proud of her brilliant designed amp and implants. Only now it seemed that they weren't so brilliant after all - they really were too good to be true.

"We'll have to talk to one of the biotics doctors at Huerta Memorial to be sure." Chakwas replied, "Her vital signs are normal, but I'll keep a close eye on them just in case. Tell Shepard about her sister's condition, but try not to worry her too much; I know what you two are like around our Doctor Shepard."

Kaidan swallowed and found his feet carrying him once again towards the door, "Do you really think it's nothing terrible?" he asked. He knew what he wanted to hear. He wanted to hear Doctor Chakwas tell him that no, she didn't think it was extremely bad and that she was sure a doctor at the hospital would be able to clear everything up and have Avalon discharged within a couple of days at the very latest. But he should have known better than to hope for something so positive and idealistic in the middle of a war. The look on Doc's face had him swallowing down disappointment again.

"I don't know Kaidan. The situation she is in is theoretically impossible. She just seems to be a hurricane of surprises; I just hope it doesn't crush her. For your sake as well as hers and Shepard's."

Kaidan nodded again; heading out into the mess hall and for the first time since Ashley Williams had died on Virmire, he found himself repeating a verse from the Bible that she had recited to him once.

" _She is clothed with strength and dignity, and she laughs without fear of the future."_

Avalon would be fine… right?


	12. Betrayal, Nightmares and Reality

Doctor Michel had seen a lot of strange things in her time; she had had her medical clinic stormed by thugs; treated a quarian who had been hunted by Saren's assassins; and recently in the war she had found herself confronted with injuries that should have been impossible to heal. But not once had she ever been with a biotic patient who had been knocked out from high stress levels due to her biotic amp not functioning.

"Her amp wasn't working?" she repeated calmly, "But Avalon was still able to perform and apply her biotics practically?"

"While under attack from a Reaper." Kaidan told her. Michel was unable to stop herself from staring at him with calculating eyes as he and Chakwas stood protectively over the younger Shepard who was sprawled - once again - across a hospital bed in Huerta Memorial.

"That is impossible." she dismissed, "Even with a bio-amp, harnessing biotics in a life or death situation takes years of training - there is no way-"

"Avvy uses an amp and implants of her own design; they might have malfunctioned somehow."

"But it still doesn't explain how she was able to use her biotics in the first place." Chakwas added.

Michel turned back to her computer monitor, deep in thought and utterly confused. Eventually her studious mind led her to one conclusion (which left her very frustrated as she could usually formulate two or three different solutions without difficulty) and she began pulling up different screens on her monitor. From over her shoulder Kaidan read the words _Biotic Implantation Removal and Replacement._ His blood ran cold and he felt icy fingers enclose around his heart.

"No." he said, not looking at the doctor but knowing she was listening to him. "You can't replace her implants - it would destroy her."

Michel swung around to face him with an unreadable expression that made him feel very uncomfortable.

"There is only one thing that I can think of that will fix this problem permanently, Major. We can replace her custom amp and implants with military issued L5x implants and an Armali Council Prodigy bio-amp that just got sent in from Thessia. It's the best I can do."

"No." he said again, and this time his voice was harsh; causing Chakwas to put a reassuring arm on his shoulder - which he brushed off.

"There's gotta be another way - maybe a way to stabilize or fix the amp that she has. Replacing all the tech in her _must_ just be your last resort."

"Even if I could - which I cannot - it would not fix the problem permanently, it might even make it worse. This is the only way I can guarantee her safety, Major."

Kaidan gaped at her, "She'd rather die than have her custom tech removed; it would be the equivalent to amputating her and then giving her a prosthetic in it's place - she'd need to learn how to use her biotics all over again."

"And I feel terrible for her," Michel told him, "If there was a way to just change her bio-amp then I would do it in a heartbeat but I can't know for sure if her custom implants will be compatible with a new bio-amp."

He opened his mouth to protest but Chakwas interrupted him, "It's for the best Kaidan. Once she comes to terms with it, she'll be fine."

"No she won't." he replied, "She'll feel betrayed. And angry," he took a deep breath, heavy with guilt, "And I wouldn't blame her."

* * *

Avalon didn't know where she was but she knew she shouldn't be there. All she could see was blackness and it squeezed her tightly until her head felt woozy and her body grew heavy. She attempted to stumble forward, blindly but everything seemed to be moving ten times slower than usual and she stopped quickly, dazed and confused, not daring to take another step in case she walked into something that she shouldn't.

Her head slowly scanned what was in front of her but there was nothing to be seen; nothing to be made out from the intense darkness. Despite how sluggish her actions were, it hadn't affected how quickly she could react to things - which allowed the darkness to choke her and trap her with one big, black claw. It covered her mouth and stole the air in her lungs and rendered her responding scream silent. Avalon could make no noise as the darkness forced it's way into her body and began to rip her body apart from the inside out; piercing her skin and forcing glimmering obsidian-like daggers out of her.

The excruciating pain paralyzed her; leaving her truly helpless without any solution to rid herself of the dark plague that she could feel killing her. Blood was gushing out from the multiple wounds in her chest and she knew it wouldn't be long until she would die. But that didn't mean she wouldn't go down fighting.

She gathered the last of her strength - using what remained of her willpower to summon the familiar rush that would serve as a small biotic explosion that might buy her a few valuable seconds. Bracing herself for the sudden surge of energy, she clenched her fists and gritted her teeth, wondering how the hell she had gotten to be in this situation and if perhaps she had been captured by the Reapers after all.

But the energy never came.

She tried again, but this time she was cloaked in complete and utter terror that made the stab wounds in her chest flame and roar, and her biotics remained inactive. So this was it then, she thought to herself as her hands reached to where her skin wept through the fabric of her doctor's uniform. I'm just going to die here - in the complete darkness, alone. Her knees impacted with the floor but by now the doctor was numb; already feeling her life slipping away in the form of warm, sticky blood.

And just before the darkness was about to finish her off with one last stroke of its dagger, blinding white light pierced her first. Taking the time to adjust to the sudden light, Avalon could finally see. She just wished that she couldn't.

They were on the CIC deck in the Normandy. It appeared like a ghost ship, empty and forgotten - apart from the figures standing above her. It was her old co-worker, Doctor Michel; standing beside her was Shepard and beside the commander was…

Kaidan.

That was when Avalon noticed that they were all carrying black daggers that were dripping with blood. Her blood. Looking down at her chest with dread she counted the stab wounds that had been inflicted upon her while in the darkness.

Three. And three people holding one knife each. They had all betrayed her.

Kaidan stepped forward, allowing the blade to fall from his blood soaked hand, and moved his hand towards her face, trying to wipe away her tears. But she leaned backwards, doing her best to avoid his touch from where she was kneeling.

"I'm so sorry, Av." he whispered, emotions catching up to him and causing a tear to escape from his mortified gaze.

"No you're not." she choked, through tears, terror and blood.

He reached out to catch her body as she fell forward and at last her vision faded, freeing her from the burden that his betrayal had given her.

A warm sensation washed over her and all of the hurt melted away, enveloping her in a blanket of protection.

She was free.

* * *

Kaidan sat down beside the hospital bed and buried his head in his hands, inhaling deeply before letting out all of his frustrations with one long sigh. The surgery with Avalon had gone as well as it had been expected, although that did not mean that it went entirely well. Whatever she had done when she had first gone about designing and testing L6 implants had been at a very big risk to herself. Doctor Michel informed him that she had looked into Avalon's file and that the young Shepard had originally been given L3 implants just before she turned 10, but that she turned up to the hospital 8 years later and with the assistance of an asari intern, underwent a surgery to use the L6 design that she had come up with. Whatever the intern had done hadn't been correct which had probably caused the complications and issues that had spiked up on Rannoch.

But despite Chakwas' and Michel's constant reassurance that an L5x implant replacement was the best course of action, Kaidan remained unconvinced. There was something that was telling him that with all the resources and knowledge that Huerta Memorial had gained over the years, there should have been _some_ way to fix the faulty neural connection between the L6 implants and Avalon. Yet Michel seemed confident that the prototype tech was beyond saving.

He raised his head from his hands and cast his eyes over Avalon, who was breathing heavily and kept twitching in her sleep. He focused on her eyes and bit his lip nervously when he saw how wildly they seemed to flutter. Her entire body seemed to tense up even though she had barely moved since the surgery had finished. Even though her hair had been shaved during the procedure so that Doctor Michel could easily access the section of it that contained the amp, he still noted how beautiful and strong she looked despite everything. And then he noted that if he stood up for her and been her voice during the deciding conversation with Chakwas and Michel, that she might still have her custom tech right now. If he had been stronger.

"I'm so sorry Av." he whispered, tears running down his cheeks. He reached out and caressed her face, gently, gasping when her cold skin came into contact with her warm hand.

She gasped and sat up quickly, as though she had been shocked by lightning. Catching sight of him, fear and hurt clouded her usually defiant eyes.

"Get away from me!" She ordered. Her voice was chilled but Kaidan heard it waver slightly. He did what she asked, and got up from his seat, backing away slowly with hands hands raised in a surrender gesture.

"Why am I here?" she demanded to know, "What did you do to me?" _What did you do?_ She knows, he realised, I don't know how but she knows.

"It was… your amp." he started, "It wasn't working and after Rannoch…"

"Stop." He did as she said, hoping that she wouldn't have some sort of explanation about why her amp was as stone cold as it was the day she collapsed.

But when she correctly predicted what the 'problem' was - his fear began to grow bigger and bigger. "So Doctor Chakwas did a scan on me after I collapsed, right?" He nodded.

"And when she couldn't find any kind of heat being projected from it, you all came up with the conclusion that it wasn't working?" He nodded again, feeling as though she was about to give him some bad news, rather than him telling her about the L5x implant.

"I designed the amp to store heat in the centre of my body so that I could reduce my cooldown time almost indefinitely." she explained, "It works kind of like the Normandy's stealth drive when it stores the heart emissions and then lets them out when the stealth mode is deactivated."

"So then-"

"There was actually no need to hospitalise me because I am one hundred and ten percent fine. I'm excellent in fact." Then she remembered the dark place she had been trapped in. The nightmare. A pang of nausea swept over her, making her feel uneasy.

"Before I woke. You said, 'I'm so sorry.' Why are you so sorry Kaidan?" she was suddenly very aware of the monitor behind him. The same one that Kaidan had seen over Michel's shoulder.

"You didn't…"

"We thought it was the only-"

"No. No. Nonononononono NO!"

Kaidan stepped forward, wanting more than anything to hold her close and promise her that everything would be okay. But he didn't. Because he couldn't.

"I'm so-"

"DON'T YOU DARE!" she screamed, "DON'T YOU DARE TELL ME YOU'RE SORRY WHEN YOU LET THEM DO THIS TO ME!"

So he didn't. Kaidan stood by the door, trying to read her blank expression. She was angry, he knew that much - but she wasn't letting anything show anymore. It was as though she was isolating herself from him, shutting him out so that he couldn't see her anymore. She'd even wiped those first few desperate tears away.

"Tell me how I can make this better."

"Leave." The reply was almost instantaneous, suggesting that she had been about to say it anyway. He didn't want to feel hurt by what she had said. He knew that everything she said was true; every accusation; every glare - it wasn't without reason. Deep down he'd hoped that Avalon would have just nodded and kept quiet during his explanation of the surgery and afterwards he'd apologise and they'd hold each other for as long as it took to forget about everything. He hated being a romantic in the middle of a war.

So he left, vowing to be stronger. To be better.

For her.


	13. Back to Square 1

It was two weeks before Avalon was discharged from the dull life that hospital gave her and by the end of it she was teeming for an opportunity to hit something - spending two weeks in almost complete isolation could have that effect on people; especially people who relied heavily on biotics to survive. For the most part, she had been sentenced to staying in bed which meant that her only source of entertainment was watching vids. Most of the extranet revolved around the war effort and at the thought of the Normandy crew fighting their way through Thessia, the younger Shepard quickly abandoned the idea of keeping up to date on the news. She had been bored and tormented with the idea that there was so many opportunities for her friends to die in the timespan of two weeks. So when Doctor Michel finally approached her and told her that she could go, the last thing she expected was to have her feet take her to the place where it all had started.

The Normandy still hadn't returned to the Citadel after the Reaper's had taken Thessia - something that Avalon couldn't make herself forget - if the Normandy had been sighted somewhere else, the Alliance News Network was keeping it under wraps pretty well. She had nowhere else to go - after she joined the Normandy crew she gave up her apartment - so for some reason that only her subconscious knew, Avalon fished out an old clubbing dress from her footlocker that had been dropped off at her room before the Normandy left two weeks ago and went to the familiar grounds of Purgatory.

She was relieved to see that the beat hadn't changed and she soon fell into her own flow again; twirling and grooving to the techno beat that pounded through the speakers. The stress that had been building up over the weeks began to slowly melt off of her body like candle wax and she rejoiced in the newfound energy that she found in her old routine. Then she remembered the bar.

Signalling to the asari bartender who was on duty to give her a shot of something strong, she managed to store all of her thoughts and worries in the back of her mind, focusing intently on bobbing to the beat and waving her hands carelessly through the air as if she'd been drinking all night.

"Aren't you that one girl who got jumped by batarians a few months back?" the asari asked her from behind the bar. Avalon turned to face her, arms still waving, "And aren't you that bartender who ran away from the first sign of trouble?"

The asari scoffed, "I was gonna get someone who could actually help you. I'm not payed enough to risk my neck against rogue batarians for my customers."

"So what are you payed for?" Avalon only just realised how much she missed this - talking to people; teasing them; flirting with them. It was who she was, and she had been lonely for too long. Long enough to try to have a bit of fun in a nightclub.

The asari leaned forward against the bar so that Avalon could feel her breath against her face - and her heart soon began to dance with the rapid club beat as well. Another full shot glass made its way into the doctor's hand and before she knew it, the bartender was turned towards another customer. Slightly dazed, Avalon took a moment to reel her thoughts in - slightly overwhelmed by the effect she'd forgotten asari had on her. Already she could sense the sluggish blur of alcohol forcing its way through her bloodstream, numbing her mind and putting everything around her in slow motion. Her head was clouded and foggy; eyes capturing what they could but extremely slowly and she felt as if she was watching a vid that kept bu...ffe...ring and then continuing before beginning to b..u..ffe..r again.

The club no longer felt full of energy and fun. The atmosphere felt heavy with fear and false hope - almost sickeningly so. This wasn't a place to hang out and have a few drinks, Avalon realised as she gave up dancing and fell across the bar. This was a place to get drunk on purpose in order to escape. And she had fallen prey to its allure. To its poison. Literally.

The club lights and the music began to make her head ache; her eyes were struggling to stay open and she had a sudden urge to curl up in a ball in order to block out the sounds and sights that were now abusing her body. In front of her she heard a laugh - one that sounded practised - and her blurred vision dragged up towards the sound of the voice. It was the asari bartender.

"Are you sure you're feeling okay?" she asked innocently, with a smile playing on her lips. Avalon couldn't speak, her body burdened with a terrible weight that felt paralyzing. She had been drugged - or poisoned - but she couldn't tell with what. She had only ever treated patients who had overdosed on Hallex and she had _never_ been under the influence herself as it subdued her biotics. Her biotics. She was strong enough.

Or rather she _had_ been.

"Why me?" she blurted out, forcing herself past the poisonous barrier that tried to render her silent. The asari glared at her and crossed her arms. "We all put our faith in your species. In your _Commander Shepard_. And we lost Thessia because she wasn't good enough." A tear escaped her eye and she wiped it away furiously, "I lost my whole family because she wasn't strong enough. Because Cerberus - a pro _human_ \- group, got to Thessia first. And now here we are, a few weeks later and has anyone heard of Shepard's location? No. Because she fucked up and then didn't have the balls to stick around to admit it!"

Avalon felt herself slipping away as the drugs finally took hold of her, back into the darkness and the sobs of the asari still echoed in her thoughts.

* * *

The mission at Sanctuary hadn't been easy at all and Kaidan still felt revolted when he remembered what Cerberus had been doing with all of the desperate refugees that had been unlucky enough to think they would be save on Horizon. So many dead bodies. So much blood. He quickly put all of the mental images he had seen into a box and padlocked it shut with a heavy chain. He couldn't do it. He couldn't think of those children, those innocent children who had died as test experiments - which he had gunned down in order to shut down the facility with Shepard. He couldn't help but wish Avalon had been there with him; her of all people would have understood, would have been able to empathise. It wasn't as if the mission had gone badly; Shepard seemed pretty happy to have Miranda Lawson working with them again, even if it was just to aid the Crucible project - and Traynor had now managed to track the Cerberus assassin Kai Leng back to the Illusive Man's main station. It was almost over, and yet Kaidan felt that he hadn't spent as much time with the people he loved as he should have.

Like Avalon for instance. Sure they'd had dinner and they'd kissed; confessing their feelings for one another. But he still didn't feel like they'd spent an overwhelming amount of time with her and now that she was all the way back on the Citadel, it really didn't seem as if they would ever get the chance to see each other again. Shepard certainly wouldn't return to the Citadel when they were so close to getting back the Prothean VI - not unless she had to anyway.

They were currently in the Fortuna System of the Horse Head Nebula waiting for Shepard to come down from her cabin with a plan of attack. Although she hadn't immediately declared that the next thing they would do included executing the Illusive Man, Kaidan was sure she wasn't about to suggest that they all take some shore leave and return to the Citadel.

So he sat on the chair that was by the window of the observation deck and let his gaze wander all of the stars and the slightly bigger splotch in the distance that was Noveria. The intercom crackled and he recognised Traynor's voice, "Shepard wants the whole team in the war room." The major got to his feet, after taking a deep breath.

It was time.

* * *

This time when Avalon woke and found herself in an unfamiliar place, she didn't freak out. It seemed to be the norm now and she wasn't entirely sure yet if she was dreaming again. The room she was in was dimly lit and she recognised the style of the room immediately as it mirrored the apartment she once lived in.

So she was still in the Citadel. That was a relief. Although it still did leave the question of why she was here and who brought her here. She didn't particularly want to know either answers. She just wanted to leave and get on with salvaging as much of her life as possible until the Normandy came back.

"Well look who's awake." A harsh voice sniggered. It was a batarian, and with a feeling of dread quickly swelling up within her, Avalon sat up on the floor as best she could now that she realised that her hands were bound, and found herself looking at the same batarian she had 'educated' back at Purgatory when she had first met Kaidan.

Kaidan. God she missed him.

"What do _you_ want?" she scowled, and the batarian crossed his arms. "You're not getting answers that quickly. First I want to kno-."

"I'm not telling you anything, fucker."

Before she knew what was happening, a lash of pain flared up on her cheek and the sound of the slap reverberated off the walls of the empty room. He thought he could threaten her, beat her up and interrogate her. She gritted her teeth and closed her eyes. He had another thing coming.

"I'll break more than your fingers this time if you don't let me go right now!" she hissed, praying that her threat would work. It wasn't exactly an empty threat - she just wasn't sure if she could do it when she hadn't used biotics at all since the transplant.

"Give it your best shot." he growled, holding his arms out to his sides. Avalon did her best, forcing the mass effect around them to bend to her will, trying to do something to wipe the smirk off of the batarian's face as he watched her. Even with her hands bound, she still managed to shove him with a biotic fist; thrusting her hands forward in one giant slam.

It was half the amount of force she used to be capable of but it was enough to knock him off his feet - leaving her slightly alarmed when all he did was laugh as he impacted the floor.

He got to his feet again quickly, still smirking, "This outta be fun."

Did he know how cliche he sounded? Avalon wondered to herself as he approached her; steel glinting in his hand.

He wasn't going to stab her, she decided - almost positive that there was more to the batarian's plan than just mutilating her. The bindings around her hands fell loose shortly after he bent down towards her, knife in hand.

Her eyes narrowed, "What are you doing?"

"I never got to finish my fight with Shepard - and now that the last of the batarian fleet has been pledged to fight the Reapers, I can never find out if she really is as tough as she makes out to be."

"And what the fuck does that have to do with me?"

An irritated growl emerged from his throat and all four of his eyes darkened, "If I can't fight Shepard, then I'll fight her sister."

"That is the stupidest thing I have ever heard." Avalon snipped.

"I wouldn't expect a human to understand."

Avalon refrained herself from punching him. How many times had she heard an alien say that to a human? It was practically the essence of the racial enmity between humanity and every other species.

"Try me." she spat.

Before she knew it, he had pulled her roughly to her feet and took a few steps back from her - his whole body poised for a fight.

This was just ridiculous.

"You dragged me all the way to this apartment so that we could spar?" she processed the information quickly and then stepped forward, preparing herself as she readied her stance a few feet away from her opponent.

"No yielding." he said, eyes glinting, "We fight until one of us is unable to continue."

"Or you could just let me go and avoid the stupid deathmatch plan that you've got going for you at the moment."

"It starts NOW!" he lunged forward.

* * *

Commander Shepard was absolutely livid. Sometimes she wished that she didn't have to answer to Admiral Hackett because he seemed to be the only thing that ever stopped her from 'doing something rash' when in reality she would be eliminating the second largest threat in this galactic war.

Kaidan didn't know the full story as to why he walked into the war room and was met with a bunch of frustrated looking people but once Shepard began to explain the plan of action, he understood why the commander and Garrus were looking particularly agitated.

"Hackett has requested that we return to the Citadel in order to restock on supplies." Shepard announced when every squad member, including Traynor, had assembled.

He felt his heart practically jump out of his chest, before plummeting dramatically to the floor.

"I do not care what your admiral thinks." Javik declared, "We must infiltrate and destroy the Cerberus base while we have the chance."

"We can't just ignore a direct order from Hackett." Kaidan spoke up, although he hadn't exactly planned on interrupting the sullen Prothean. He had made a point of trying not to antagonise Javik ever since they had met. He swallowed nervously as the Prothean glared at him but he didn't drop his gaze. Kaidan had been promoted to a major for one reason: he was a soldier - one of the best - and ignoring orders from his superiors was not something he wanted to do if he could avoid it.

"It doesn't matter what any of you think," Shepard snapped, "We're gonna have to dock at the Citadel and we might as well take the opportunity to tie up loose ends while we're there."

 _Loose ends._ The feeling of doubt stuck to Kaidan quickly as he read between the lines. _She doesn't think we're coming back._ It was always a possibility but he hadn't expected Shepard to come to terms with it so openly; expecting her to instead meet what might be a grisly end with more defiance. Maybe the fight _had_ been kicked out of her.

"Set a course for the Citadel, Joker." Shepard called. "Aye, aye, Commander." he replied over the com.

 **AN: Okay, so... I know that this chapter is absolutely tedious but I can't really see a way around it. This is just a stepping stone that is needed in order to set these final chapters on course so please - I beg you - just bear with this. I've tried to fix this chapter up to make it as bearable as possible so thank you for reading it :) Special mention to sherl0ck3d for being an amazing friend and great advisor.**


	14. Sparring In The Dark

It seemed like forever since Kaidan had enjoyed the tranquility that the Citadel offered; Shepard saw the quiet of the Presidium as denial of the war - bewildered as to why everyone seemed to be calm, even after the attempted coup. The commons seemed as they usually did: uninteresting and full of ambassadors and other diplomats who had just left the Embassy after another stressful day of representing their species. Kaidan noted that the scorch marks and bullet holes still had not be repaired from the hallways that led to the apartments; realising that the tenants who walked through the halls daily had become painfully aware of this as well - the ones who he had watched walk through the halls had eyed up the bullet holes nervously before continuing on with their day.

The Citadel had that effect on people - appearing timeless until the night cycle would kick in and an eery quiet would fall over the entire station. Kaidan had always felt slightly more tense being in the Presidium ever since Shepard had discovered the Conduit - the smaller, one way Mass Relay that had been mistaken as a statue for hundreds of years until Saren had activated it. He supposed that a massive alien station had to have some flaws.

Standing by the entrance of the two sets of stairs that led both left and right towards the apartments, he took another look at his omni-tool and the tracker that it was displaying. He admitted to himself that placing the temporary tracker on Avalon when she went in for surgery wasn't such a bad idea now that it had led him to her. When the Normandy had arrived a few hours ago, he had checked in with the hospital only to be met by Doctor Michel and informed that Avalon had been discharged already. With that in mind, he was led back to the one place he could think of that she would be after being cooped up in a hospital bed for two weeks - Purgatory Nightclub. It was there he had scoped out the bar and even asked the asari behind the bar if she had seen the redheaded doctor recently.

"Sure she was here," she said, not looking at him, "She got absolutely wasted and some batarian offered to carry her out for me."

"And you just let him?" he had asked, shaking his head in disbelief.

"If she wants to get hammered and act the fool in my club then I don't give a damn what happens to her!" And then she had turned to another customer, ignoring him until he had left and in despair, tried to activate the tracker from his omni-tool - only to find that it was already working. Michel had installed the tracker specifically for the purpose of observing the biotic activity of Avalon; making it so that if the young Shepard attempted to use her biotics before she was ready, anyone who had access to the program inside of the tracker would be able to see. He had assumed that Michel had not checked on it yet or if she had, didn't think it was worth mentioning now that her patient had been discharged.

His path took him to the set of stairs on his right and he damn near jumped up them as he neared the door that Avalon was apparently behind. The orange code on the door warned him to stay away but he had begun to bypass it before he could think of the consequences should he have chosen the wrong door. Why was Avalon here? And what the hell was a batarian doing with her? He remembered the stories of what the Mindoir gang had done to her after she had been taken and his stomach lurched. Heart pounding as his bypass finished up and the lock glowed green, Kaidan drew his pistol and went in. His gasp echoed down the hallway behind him.

* * *

"Urgh!" she grunted as her bruised head took another blow from her opponent - who had pinned her down on the floor and was now straddled over her body, allowing his weight to steal her ability to move away. For the past ten minutes she had worked on getting one of her arms free from his hold while enduring the wrath of batarian fists, which had already given her a split lip and a swollen eye. A steady flow of blood was seeping from a cut on the right side of her forehead and down her bruised cheek. A sense of dizziness had kicked in now - although it might have also been from when he had thrust his knee into her stomach in order to get her into the mess she was in now. Physically, there was no way she'd be able to escape - especially with all of his focus on her, but perhaps with a distraction…

Her left arm - which had been pinned to her side - was almost free and hastily she tried to put together a plan between blows. She tried wiggling her numb fingers and managed to get the blood moving around her hand again, regaining some feeling in her fingertips. Her plan wasn't exactly complicated, it would just require good-timing and impeccable good luck, which given the circumstances, didn't seem to be possible. Yep, Avalon grimaced, she was fucked.

How she was still conscious, she had no idea; she hadn't been able to block the punches that he threw at her but for some reason she'd been able to stay alert. Desperately praying to anyone who would listen to her, Avalon shut her one good eye and felt the mass effect around them form into a sphere of energy that hovered on her open palm.

"Trying to play dead won't work!" the batarian snarled, slapping Avalon's face and causing her eye to snap open again. She almost lost her grip on the energy in her hand but miraculously, she managed to keep it from fading. She would need a few seconds after she threw it to recover and regain feeling in the rest of her body; mentally preparing herself for what would come next - she let it go.

His body was jerked upwards by the singularity and he was left drifting a metre above her, where she did her best to crawl away with her partially numb body. Her legs were completely dead and her right arm hadn't been spared from having its blood circulation cut off either. Behind her was the familiar sound of a bypass and realising that someone was about to come in - whether it be friend or foe - she reached for the silver knife that the batarian had dropped and hid underneath a table that was conveniently placed next to the door.

The bypass finished and the door opened, letting light from outside pour into the room. Avalon could hear a gasp as the stranger caught sight of a random batarian being held in a singularity field. She tested her legs again and found that despite being riddled with pins and needles, movement was now a lot easier. The stranger took a few steps forward, past her table - somewhat hesitantly - which caused the door behind them to close again, only this time it glowed green and illuminated the once again dark room. She squinted towards the unknown figure, noting the pistol that they carried and wondering frantically to herself if they were her friend or foe; unable to decipher anything obvious in their appearance that would answer her question, she slid out from the table so that she was now behind them.

Her singularity field was failing - Avalon could feel the energy waver and she knew that the batarian would feel it too. Knife in hand, she rose to her feet - wobbling slightly - and crept towards the other figure in the room who was facing away from her. She raised her arm as if she was about to hack into the neck of stranger but then the doctor side of her surged and she lowered her arm. She didn't want to do anything rash, especially when she had no idea who it was she was about to attack. Instead she drew a weak biotic field around her fist and sent the figure sprawling on the floor, groaning.

She made a break for it, hitting the green button behind her and getting ready to run.

The cascade of light that found her eyes confirmed her suspicions that she was still on the Citadel and further observation of her surroundings while she ran down the hallway told her that she had been held in the apartments in the Presidium Commons. Nearing the end of the hall, she cut around the corner that came up on her left and headed out into the commons, intent on reaching the elevator before she was caught.

She could already hear the sound of her pursuer behind her, and she gave another short burst of energy to try and get ahead. Then she heard his voice and it made her stop dead in her tracks.

"Avalon! It's… me!" Kaidan had no idea she could run so fast and the sudden sprint down the corridor had taken him by surprise.

Her arms were around his neck in a tight embrace and he hugged her back, laughing while taking in her appearance. Her hair had begun to grow back from where it had been shaved which made her tomboyish features stand out even more and then he realised that she was still wearing one of her clubbing outfits. He chuckled to himself - it was the same dress from when they'd first met. Figures.

She drew away from him and took a deep breath of air, "Everyone thought that you'd gone missing or that the Normandy had been destroyed… no one knew… and the way we left things at the hospital…"

"It's okay." he told her, "You don't need to apologi-"

"Good." She said abruptly, "Because I wasn't going to."

Kaidan looked at her quizzically, not daring to speak - not when he so clearly recognised her tone of voice. It was the 'don't you dare fuck with me' attitude that she usually reserved for people who were either pissing her off majorly or trying to kill her.

"Not one bloody message." she said quietly, and he swallowed, his throat dry.

"Shepard didn't think it was a goo-"

"TO HELL WITH WHAT SHEPARD THINKS!" Avalon didn't mean to yell but she'd made the mistake of letting her emotions burst forth from her mouth. She closed her eyes and counted to ten, checking her breathing; slowly getting control of her temper again for whatever good it would do her.

She tried again, "A-all I needed was one message. One sign. _Anything_ that would have reassured me that you and my sister hadn't been blown to pieces by a Reaper in the middle of nowhere. _One. Message._ Would that really have been so hard?"

"I wanted to," he began, "But the message might have interfered with-"

"Stop it."

"Stop what?"

"Stop coming up with cliche excuses that literally everyone uses."

He frowned, "I don't understand."

She scoffed and began to walk back to the apartments.

"Where are you going?" he called out, following her.

"Someone has to deal with that bloody batarian."

* * *

"I didn't think you'd be stupid enough to come back here, Brooks." Shepard muttered, gritting her teeth. The commander had all but given up on figuring out why the Alliance analyst had bailed on them during the clone mess and with her head in the wrong place after being ordered back to the Citadel, Maya Brooks was the last person she wanted to see.

She didn't even care enough about the situation to ask how the hell the other woman had even managed to get into the Spectre HQ; just that she was intruding.

"And yet you haven't killed me yet." Brooks remarked dryly in a crisp British accent.

"You're not worth the energy." Shepard returned her attention back to the terminal in front of her.

"Don't you want to know where I've been?." The dark-haired woman took a few steps forward and began fiddling with her omni-tool; a few seconds later, Shepard's terminal shut off. The commander growled and then thought of a better idea. Plastering her face with amusement, the commander turned to face Brooks.

"By all means, Maya" she gestured for her to continue.

"That's not my real name - I never keep the same one for more than a few weeks."

"Then what _should_ I call you?" Shepard narrowed her eyes.

Brooks thought about it for a moment, "Rasa."

"So where _did_ you go after we killed the clone, Rasa?"

"Back to the Illusive Man; I had a few things to discuss with him."

Shepard tried to conceal her disbelief, "So you just waltzed into the Illusive Man's base and demanded to talk to him?" She crossed her arms and stared accusingly at the woman before her.

"I had information and he pays well."

"Then why not go to the Shadow Broker?"

"I think we both know the answer to that." Fuck. Liara needed to watch who she discussed her business around from now on.

"So did you sell your information? Did he hire you to spy on me?"

Brooks laughed, "He knows better than to trust me after I left."

"You left Cerberus?" Shepard doubted that the Illusive Man would allow one of his former operatives to leave with their life.

Brooks shook her head, "My past with Cerberus doesn't matter, I just wanted to make sure you knew about it."

"Why?"

"Because I'm going to help you kill the Illusive Man."

* * *

"You can't kill me, human!" the batarian snarled as Avalon stood above him and watched as he tried to escape his wrist restraints.

"I don't want to kill you, _batarian_." she quipped, paying close attention to his silver knife which she still had in her hands. Kaidan was by the door behind her; determined to make sure that if their batarian friend suddenly tried anything, that he would fail.

She kneeled down and cut the bindings with the knife; smirking as the batarian struggled to regain his composure after her unexpected act.

"You're lucky that we need your fleet." Avalon told him, stepping away from him while he got back on his feet. It was irritating that she had to let him go but she couldn't risk doing something rash when the alliance between Shepard and the batarians was at stake.

"And you're lucky that I didn't kill you when I had the chance." He barked, tilting his head to the right. For a batarian; tilting his head to the right was one of the most insulting gestures you could perform although the other species seldom realised this. Avalon, however, had taken it upon herself when she had been training as a doctor to study the other species and how they behaved. It was on occasions such as this that she was grateful she had bothered.

"Maybe next time you won't prey on women who are alone in a club." she scolded, half mockingly. He grunted and tried to push past her but she stopped him, "I wish to know what your name is."

"I'm not telling you anything, human. Move!"

"Let me rephrase that: I want to know what my opponent's name is. Despite the circumstances, you fought well."

He looked confused at the compliment but didn't respond to it - instead he scoffed and pushed past her. Kaidan put his arm out to stop him but Avalon gestured for him to let the batarian be.

Just before he left the batarian called over his shoulder, "Everyone in the Hegemony will be talking about how Nuht defeated and disgraced Commander Shepard's sister."

* * *

Avalon was still scowling after her and Kaidan had loaded into the elevator.

"Typical!" she huffed, "That asshat didn't disgrace me!"

Kaidan raised his eyebrow, "Asshat?" Her face reddened, "I heard it on an old TV show."

He laughed but she just glared at him, "I'm not done with you yet, so don't think that you're out of the shit."

The elevator door opened up to the familiar sight of Docking Bay D24, where they could just get a glimpse of the Normandy. Avalon could see James and Cortez on the other side of the scanner watching the ships come and go and the sight of them calmed her down. Soon she would be back on the Normandy and best of all, back in the fight.

A voice crept up behind them, "Oh look commander - it's your little sister. She's got a new haircut as well, although I think I preferred her old style." Avalon spun around and almost barrelled into Brooks, who smirked.

"What the hell are you doing here?" Avalon wanted to know. She hadn't expected to see the imposter ever since the clone incident. Then she noticed Shepard standing beside the other woman, looking suspicious but helpless, as if she wanted Brooks to be gone as much as the next person but was unable to do anything.

The commander explained, "Brooks has offered to help us get to the Illusive Man." Beside her, Avalon heard Kaidan snort.

"We already _know_ how to get to the Illusive Man, Shepard." he reminded her, "We don't need someone like her to get in the way. We obviously can't trust her after what happened."

"This is on my terms, Kaidan." Shepard said curtly, ignoring his concerns. What the fuck was wrong with her? Avalon thought, bewildered about her sister's behaviour. Did she doubt the capability of her crew so much that she would accept aid from someone as unreliable as Brooks?

But she said nothing. The mood Shepard was in, Avalon didn't want to say anything that would make her privilege to serve on the Normandy be revoked.

"What's going on?" she whispered to Kaidan as Brooks stalked past them with Shepard following suit.

"I don't know," he replied, "But we'd better keep an eye on her. I don't care what Shepard says - Brooks is most definitely _not_ working with us out of the goodness of her heart."

* * *

"Finally," Shepard declared as soon as she took her place at the Galaxy Map, "Take us into the Horse Head Nebula, Joker."

"Aye aye, ma'am."

Brooks stood behind the commander, eyes scanning over her private message terminal; delicately imprinting the information she read in the back of her mind.

"What are you doing?" Avalon had been shadowing Brooks ever since they had boarded the Normandy; not even allowing herself to catch up with the crew before she began to keep tabs on their new 'ally'.

Brooks took it all in her stride, "Information is power. And if we're going to beat the Illusive Man then we need a lot of it."

"Keep your eyes away from matters that don't concern you," Avalon warned, eyes boring into the other woman's head.

"The matter of the entire galaxy's existence concerns everyone."

"The galaxy can't be saved from a few petty terminal messages."

Brooks opened her mouth to form a snarky reply but Shepard cut in first, stepping down from the Galaxy Map platform to join the conversation; and then she did it - the dreaded _look_.

"You need to get past whatever grudge you have with Brooks. If we're going to stop the Illusive Man then we all need to work _together_ , Avalon. Surely you all of people, understand."

Avalon swore under her breath but didn't say anything else. What was the point? Her sister had her mind set on destroying Cerberus and as far as she was concerned, anyone who wanted to help was welcome.

"I don't like this," she confessed to Kaidan on the observation deck after Brooks had retired to the crew quarters, "But what can we do? Shepard isn't going to listen to us. I don't know why - maybe she just doesn't want to."

"Maybe Brooks knows something," he offered, gazing out of the huge window.

She frowned, "Maybe. In a few hours I suppose we'll find out."

He looked at her and smiled reassuringly, reaching for her hand and squeezing it, "Hey, if she's up to anything then we'll stop her."

Her eyes remained unconvinced, "I hope that's true."


	15. Resolution and Goodbye: Part 1

**AN: Just like in previous chapters I have used dialogue from Mass Effect 3. All rights go to BioWare and it's writers apart from the dialogue that Avalon says.**

"Everything okay, Cortez?" Shepard yelled over the sound gunfire coming from the hangar. Behind her, Avalon, Brooks and EDI were crouched down with their guns drawn - ready to start fighting back at the offending Cerberus troopers.

Cortez's reply rang out over their comms, "I'm fine."

"Doesn't look like fine." Avalon retorted, but he ignored her.

"I've got repairs to make here. Give Cerberus hell!"

"Shouldn't be too hard, given Shepard's history with them." Brooks smirked, taking aim over the cover of the shuttle and unleashing bursts of bullets. Avalon glared at her, remembering how moments earlier, the other woman had tried to convince Shepard not to take her sister or Kaidan, "They'll be safer on the Normandy with each other," she pointed out, but although Shepard shook her head, she had still taken some of Brooks' words to heart and told Kaidan that he would not be accompanying her; insisting she would be fine with Brooks, EDI and Avalon watching her back.

"Be careful." Was all Kaidan had had a chance to say to Avalon before she was called onto the shuttle that was going to take them into the Cerberus HQ. They hadn't expected the shuttle to crash into the hangar for everyone in the facility to see their attempted infiltration but she supposed that there was nothing to be done about it now. The Fifth Fleet was laying siege to what remained of Cerberus but it would all be for nothing if they didn't get the Prothean VI from the Illusive Man.

Over her sister's shoulder Avalon could see another piece of cover that would serve her nicely and she inched towards it slowly and peered around the shuttle, glimpsing at a swarm of troopers who were closing in on their position rapidly. She hurled a orb of singularity at them and took the opportunity she had created to dive into the next cover. Shepard, Brooks and EDI quickly followed suit, taking down more enemies with every shot that they made. But it seemed as if every time they killed one trooper, they would be replaced by another almost instantly. Avalon was buzzing with adrenaline in her veins, and she popped out of cover and landed a shot squarely on a wounded centurion who she had been targeting for the last few minutes. That was when she saw it.

"Shit - they're bringing in mechs Shepard!" she told her sister as they crouched down again and replaced their thermal clips.

"Leave it to me!" the commander replied and then she activated her infiltrator cloak - vanishing from view. Avalon hoped that for Shepard's sake the cloak stayed up long enough for her to do whatever it was she was attempting.

The waves of enemies were still coming in at a steady rate and for a few more minutes Avalon, EDI and Brooks were far too occupied protecting their backs to worry about where Shepard had ended up.

But despite that their bullets had barely grazed the surface of the Atlas, it looked as if it was about to explode at any moment. Avalon caught sight of a sticky grenade going off on top of the mech, which was enough to make it fall and explode. She saw Shepard a moment later, grinning with her Black Widow sniper in hand.

This time when Avalon shot down another soldier, no one immediately replaced him. They began to whittle down the remaining enemy force quickly, with Avalon using her biotics to single out the hiding Nemesis who had been scoping out their every move.

"What happens now?" Avalon asked her sister, but then they heard the VI.

"Security breach in Hangar 16. Initiating Achilles Protocol."

"What is it with Cerberus and Greek mythology?" Avalon muttered under her breath. She knew that whatever this 'Achilles Protocol' was, it couldn't be good. EDI confirmed her suspicions.

"Shepard, Cerberus intends to vent the hangar bay!"

"Can you stop them?" Shepard wanted to know, looking around for something that might help.

The A.I nodded, "I need an active console. Try the upper level." The squad follow thee commander across the hangar bay towards a ladder that went up onto the second level. Following the corridor, they soon came across a large console that overlooked the entire hangar.

"EDI, I've got a console. Go!" Shepard commanded.

The A.I rushed forward and began tapping buttons on the interface in a flurry. In less than five seconds the look of worry that had crept up on EDI had disappeared.

"Hangar vent procedure… disabled."

"Can you open the hangar?" Shepard wanted to know.

"No." EDI replied, "However… I can access their fighter launch controls." Avalon glanced through the window at the fighter that was now stationed in the middle of the hangar. She had a feeling she knew exactly what Shepard was going to do next.

"Shepard, Cerberus is aware that the venting attempt failed. Reinforcements are inbound!"

"This is going to be fun." Brooks declared, her gun once again drawn.

"To our left!" Avalon yelled, dodging enemy fire and sliding into cover; hoping that her singularity field would take out a few more of the resisting force. What she didn't understand was why there were so many soldiers still fighting for the pro-human group. Cerberus had done some evil thing. Sanctuary was proof of that, yet ordinary people - nice people - kept signing up for duty, no matter how inhumane it really was. Was everyone really so scared of the Reapers that they were able to be blinded by a different type of evil?

Her shot took down the last guardian who was left - until they heard another Cerberus squad ahead.

"Keep pushing forward!" Shepard called to them from cover, a little way ahead of them. It was a good ten minutes of fighting before they appeared to be making any progress.

"Brooks and Avalon, stay here!" Shepard commanded, "EDI with me!"

Avalon turned to cover their backs as Shepard and EDI ran into the corridor behind her. She heard EDI over her comm as she continued to gun down men with Brooks.

"Overriding safeties. The fighter should now launch toward the hangar door."

Shepard and EDI came back out to their other squadmates, looking somewhat satisfied with their efforts.

"Perfect. Now let's get down there." Shepard said, gesturing to the now empty hangar bay below.

Sliding down the ladder, Shepard found the launch controls close by and activated them quickly. The fighter lit up and shot towards the hangar door; exploding in a swirling ball of fire.

"Well… that was dramatic." Brooks said, after a while. Avalon glared at her again with untrusting eyes.

"The central lab was located behind this hangar." EDI informed them all, "I suggest we follow the fighters path."

Shepard nodded, "Noted. Let's move!"

Avalon heard the heavy steps of a mech and her heart sank. "Um, Shepard?" she said, pointing her gun at the approaching Atlas.

"Just stay close and hit it with everything you've got!" Shepard advised, "The quicker we get rid of it, the less damage it can do."

The Cerberus VI started back up again, "Intruder alert. All personnel prepare for security lockdown."

Shit.

* * *

"That was the last Cerberus team in the area." EDI said, after the mech was now a smouldering pile of junk.

"Good." Avalon needed a breather, "I think that might have been the hardest part."

"Don't lose your focus, Av." Shepard told her. Avalon snorted, taking a look at Brooks.

"Don't worry," she said, narrowing her eyes at their supposed 'ally', "I won't."

They approached the hole that the fighter had caused and Avalon whistled, "That thing did a fuckton of damage."

"Good." Shepard said, eyeing up the locked door that blocked their path, "EDI, can you get past it?"

EDI began to analyse the door before she replied, "One moment. Cerberus has updated their encryption. There may be a slight delay as I bypass security."

"Let me know when you're through."

"I am through."

The door opened and EDI walked through and turned to face the squad, "We must proceed through a sublevel to avoid Cerberus containment measures."

Shepard shot to where the A.I was pointing and then glanced back, "Where do you think we'll find the Prothean VI?"

"A central lab at the heart of this facility. It is the most secure area. Following the destruction left by the fighter with offer the most direct route."

They descended and were met by a weaker resistance that did not last longer than a few minutes against a Spectre, former Cerberus operative, A.I and biotic. But their attempt to stop them seemed so feeble that Avalon was suddenly heavy with guilt. It was as if they hadn't even been trying.

"Are you alright Avalon?" Shepard asked, noting her sister's expression.

"We've killed so many of them," Avalon replied, "How can they just throw their lives away like this?"

"Their intention is to delay us, not stop us." EDI piped up, "Engineers are currently preparing an organised defense ahead."

"They can waste that many troops?" Shepard sounded surprised.

The A.I nodded, "Yes. Cerberus employs Reaper augmentation on captured civilians to create functional shock troops quickly."

Avalon felt sick. She had just assumed they were volunteers who had offered themselves to help in a time of fear and desperation. But instead they had been taken against their will to be used as an expendable pawn on a chessboard.

They moved on and found themselves climbing up another ladder that led to another locked door. EDI immediately began working on a bypass.

"We will be through momentarily." She announced and Shepard nodded approvingly.

The A.I pointed towards a terminal, "Shepard, that console has not been fully scrubbed. It contains data you may find interesting."

"What am I looking at?" Shepard asked.

EDI turned, "Project Lazarus. Your reconstruction."

Avalon spun around to see her sister facing the console with an unreadable expression. Shepard had mentioned Project Lazarus to her only briefly and it had been something that - as a doctor and a scientist - Avalon had wanted to know about in detail, more than anything. And now here it was. The console with all of the answers. Her sister seemed reluctant to activate it but she opened the first entry.

" _It can't be done. It's not a matter of resources." The scientist looked unimpressed with The Illusive Man's plan._

" _It's always a matter of resources. We're not losing Shepard."_

" _Sir, Shepard is clinically brain-dead. After that much trauma, that long with no oxygen… we cannot overcome nature."_

" _Operative Lawson disagrees. She is now in charge of Project Lazarus."_

Shepard couldn't look at the screen, "I didn't realise it was that bad."

Avalon reached out and put a hand on her sister's shoulder, "I understand why you never told me about this. Are you okay, Aishlynn?"

Shepard took a step away from the console so that she was beside her sister, "I'm still me. I doubt I'd have been able to turn against Cerberus otherwise." she paused, taking everything in. "I don't remember anything. Maybe they really just fixed me, or maybe I'm just a high-tech VI that thinks it's Commander Shepard. But I don't know… I…"

Avalon could tell she was now on the brink. The brink of what, she didn't know but she could tell that this was now eating away at her. Avalon had to say something.

"You're still you, is no way Cerberus would have known about me surviving after Mindoir, but yet you recognised me at the Citadel. You're not a VI - you're my big sister and we're gonna make the Illusive Man and the Reapers pay for what this war has cost us."

Gratefulness washed over the commander and before she knew what she was doing she was overcome by a sense of pride and strength; found in Avalon's words. She wrapped her sister up in a quick embrace, wishing that they weren't in the middle of a mission so that she could explain just how much she appreciated having her sister again. Instead she broke away from the hug and returned her attention to the console; activating the second entry.

" _Tissue regeneration is proceeding. The helmet kept the brain intact… for whatever good that will do." It was the same scientist as before._

" _Lawson will find a way." The Illusive Man told him._

" _Sir, Shepard's an Alliance soldier. As far as she knows, we're a terrorist organisation."_

" _I'm not looking for a dance partner. We need Shepard, and Shepard needs resources. She'll work with us."_

Shepard looked livid. Her sister quickly interrupted her train of thought, "He had you boxed in. If the Alliance hadn't abandoned you then I know that you wouldn't have worked with Cerberus. You did what you had to do."

"Perhaps." Came Shepard's reply, "Every instinct I had told me not to trust Cerberus. But I needed their help so I played along." She played the last entry.

" _Project Lazarus is reporting neurological activity. They're requesting more funding." It was the scientist and he was talking to the Illusive Man again._

" _Granted. Get me our potential recruits file. Shepard will be up soon. We need a crew."_

" _Our existing forces should be more than sufficient-"_

 _The Illusive Man shook his head, "No. We need sympathetic faces. I need Shepard invested. Tap Kelly Chambers and recruit Donnelly. I imagine Miss Daniels will follow. We'll want some old friends as well. Contact Doctor Chakwas, and send me the psych profile on Shepard's pilot… along with a bottle of Thessia '47 Red."_

"Impressive manipulation techniques." Brooks remarked, "You'll recall that it was I who assembled the dossiers that he mentioned."

Avalon gave her another murderous glare, as if she could command Brooks to shut up.

"How's that door coming along EDI?" Shepard asked.

"We are clear to proceed." She informed them.

Admiral Hackett came through on their comm, "Incursion team, what's your status?"

"We've cleared the hangar and are inside the base." Shepard replied, moving her team forward slowly, gun raised and ready.

"Good work. Do you need support?"

"Negative," she replied, "Keep the heat on. We'll find what we need."

Now they had to follow the path left from the fighter that they had launched, making sure to avoid the hazardous flames that had sprouted up everywhere. There was another ladder which they climbed with caution, and another door that needed EDI's attention.

"I will bypass the lock. If you are interested, the console nearby is still functional." But Shepard was already shaking her head, "We don't have time. Proceed as normal."

"Understood, Shepard." EDI began the bypass. Avalon glanced at the console curiously and recognised that it was information about the Enhanced Defense Intelligence - EDI. She had always been curious about the A.I and so while no one was looking, she downloaded the data from the console onto her omni-tool. Perhaps I can use some of it at the hospital, she thought, if I ever survive this bloody war.

Hackett had returned, "Incursion team, are you still with us? We're limiting fire as best we can!"

Shepard watched EDI work on the door as she replied, "Admiral, we're in deep, and the Prothean VI will be in the safest part of the station. Don't hold back."

"This isn't Torfan, Shepard. I'm not risking you unless I have to."

"I'll be fine," Shepard insisted, "Just take Cerberus down. Please."

There was a long pause, "Understood, Commander."

The team passed through hallway after hallway in silence until the entire facility shook and a loud explosion echoed through the halls.

"That sounded like a generator," Avalon realised, "The Fifth Fleet is kicking ass out there!"

"They'll get it done." Shepard said, finding the door that they needed.

It led into yet another hallway, only this one had another active console. Shepard barely glanced at it before she kept moving, "Let's keep pressing forward." she commanded.

Out of the corner of her eye, Avalon could see how joyful Brooks seemed to be, despite everything. It only made her distrust the former Cerberus operative even more.

* * *

"What the hell is that thing?" Avalon breathed, staring up at the abomination that hung above them.

"It's the Proto-Reaper that I destroyed at the Collector Base," Shepard explained, "What's left of it. I'm surprised Cerberus recovered that much from the base."

"They tried to recover much more of it," Brooks said, "I can see why. That heart is _very_ impressive. You could probably power this entire facility with it."

"All of those colonists… processed into _that_ , and Cerberus just hangs it up like a trophy," Shepard said, bitterly.

"We'll stop them," Avalon promised. They made their way up the staircase and onto the railway that overlooked the rest of the abomination. Despite its inactivity it still felt as though it was watching them all. Avalon shivered.

"Cerberus phantoms incoming!" EDI called. Sure enough, a squad of Cerberus troops were defending the only way through. The first phantom fell down dead before she knew what had hit her. The second was a little more cautious and stuck to hiding and then striking when they were most vulnerable. It was by luck and luck alone that Avalon managed to use a biotic fist to throw her over the rail just as she was about to impale Shepard from behind.

"Thanks!" her sister yelled.

"Don't mention it!" she replied.

They didn't see the third phantom.

It grabbed Avalon from behind and began to choke her, holding her struggling body as she fought for air. Shepard hadn't seen. She couldn't hear the gasps of her sister. Everything was fading. Getting darker. And darker, and darker and darker and-

BANG.

Phantom blood soaked her head and dripped down her back. When she had caught her breath again, Avalon turned to see Brooks standing behind the fallen body, pistol drawn and a familiar smirk on her face again.

"You're welcome," she said in her crisp accent, before stalking off after Shepard.

"Cerberus soldiers are coming up from below!" EDI told them all, watching as a large group of soldiers blocked their path again. In all of the commotion, Avalon had lost sight of Brooks for the first time and, distracted by this sudden fact, a bullet brought down her barrier and another followed it, skimming her cheek. Blood trickled down her face.

She found Brooks up ahead with Shepard, who was attempting to do some serious crowd control with her pistol and grenades. But just like in the hangar bay, every time one foe fell, they were replaced by another. EDI was now taking a lot of heavy fire, despite that she had fallen back.

"Need assistance!" The A.I exclaimed, falling to her knees in an attempt to keep in cover. Avalon saw Brooks and Shepard inching forward to the ladder, with no intent of staying behind to assist EDI. Behind her, more troopers were gathering to where EDI had fallen and Avalon knew that there was no way she could leave the A.I behind after everything that had happened. Even if she wouldn't technically die, her body would be lost and Joker would be devastated. She had to go back.

Her singularity suspended the last of them in the air and she finished it off with a satisfying warp explosion. Examining her patient, she could see straight away what areas of the body needed patching up. She had limited resources but she drew her omni-tool and set to work.

* * *

There was one last door to go through. Shepard hated the idea of leaving Avalon to fix up EDI but Brooks was right. They couldn't waste valuable time waiting for a squad member when they could be retrieving what they needed instead. The door to the central lab was already open and Shepard stopped to take a breath before she did anything else.

"This is it," she told Brooks, "Stay sharp."

The door opened. The Illusive Man was not there. Deep down, Shepard hadn't expected him to be. It would have been far too easy. She just hoped that Brooks wasn't too pissed off. She needed every soldier she could get her hands on. Even someone as disloyal as Brooks.

She sat down at the chair in front of the large monitor and began to shift through files to try and find the one that she wanted, "We need to locate the Prothean VI." She said. Brooks began to navigate her way through the other side of the monitor.

"Shepard." It was the Illusive Man. "You're in _my_ chair." Shepard got up and spun around, gun pointed at the voice's whereabouts, but it was only his image from the QEC.

"This chair's about the only damn thing you have left. Cerberus is finished."

"On the contrary," he said, "We have achieved everything I ever imagined. Almost everything."

Shepard scoffed, "Yeah, we all saw what you accomplished on Sanctuary. But it's not the same as controlling a Reaper."

"A significant hurdle," he admitted, "But thanks to the Prothean VI, I have what I need to make it a reality."

"The Catalyst." she realised. He nodded, "Yes."

"Even with Cerberus in ruins, you still think you can do this your way."

"I'd expect you to say that. You never truly believed in us. Cerberus isn't just an organisation or the people behind it. Cerberus is an idea." He took a puff of his cigar, "That idea is not so easily destroyed. Besides, I've already acquired what you're looking for."

"I've got it!" Brooks declared. The Illusive Man turned his attention towards her, "Rasa. I thought I might be seeing you again, although I don't suppose you told the commander why you're really here."

"I'm here because I wanted to kill you," Brooks sniped.

"Yet your lack of surprise at my absence when you entered the lab was quite convenient for someone who had allied with one of her former enemy specifically so she could kill me."

"Cerberus taught me to be prepared for anything," Brooks argued.

"I see you're still attempting to lie despite your body language betraying you." he noted.

She didn't reply. Instead she opened the Prothean VI. The green program took the form of a Prothean.

"Online. Security breach detected," it said.

"Enjoy your little chat," The Illusive Man said, "But don't overstay your welcome."

* * *

EDI was functional again. "Thank you for restoring me, Doctor Avalon."

"No problem," Avalon said, standing up and putting away her omni-tool. She was anxious to get moving again - it had been far too long since Shepard and Brooks had gone up ahead and she was almost positive that something had gone wrong.

"How fit are you to move?" she asked.

"Your repairs are more than adequate and will be sufficient enough to last through many more combat scenarios. I appreciate the effort."

"Let's go then."

* * *

They had everything they needed, "Let's go Brooks," Shepard said, turning towards the exit.

"Not so fast." The assassin - Kai Leng - stood in the way with his gun drawn at the commander. She narrowed her eyes, "You."

He began to encircle her, "He did warn you not to overstay your welcome." Then without warning he charged towards her and leapt into the air, sword drawn.

"ARGH!" his hand let a biotic charge loose into the floor that made the panels fly off, revealing large groves in the floor that Shepard realised could be used for cover if she really needed them.

Behind her, Brooks was now preoccupied with some phantoms who had dropped down from the floor above, "You deal with Leng!" she yelled at Shepard, "I'll handle these guys."

He was damn fast. It seemed that no matter how quick Shepard moved, Kai Leng was _much_ faster. She doubted that he was even trying - not putting it past him to just toy with her and watch as she did her best to shoot him but always coming out a few milliseconds too slow. But that advantage ended whenever he tried to attack. He might have been nimble but Shepard had the brute strength that was needed to knock him off his feet. Even though he recovered almost instantaneously, it was reassuring to know that he wasn't completely untouchable.

He lunged at her with his sword and she met it with her omni-blade, taking advantage of his sudden vulnerability by kicking him in the groin and then pinning him down to the floor while he tried to recover. She didn't hesitate and plunged her blade through his chest - penetrating his shields and his heart.

But the battle wasn't over. Shepard turned to try and find Brooks only to be punched in the jaw by her instead.

"Now it's time for my favourite part, Commander." Brooks said, "It's time for _our_ fight now."

 **AN: Hi! Thanks so much for reading this far - and for reviewing. Particularly** **eurodox59,** **who has offered me invaluable advice that has allowed me to improve my development of this story far beyond what I normally would have been capable of. I really do appreciate any or all advice and support that has been given to me while writing this. Sorry, this is sounding a bit like a monologue and it isn't even the last chapter yet! There is one more chapter to come and it will probably be coming out in the next couple of days. :) Thank you again for reading and I hoped you enjoyed!**


	16. Resolution and Goodbye: Part 2

**AN: So like before, I have used A LOT of the original dialogue from Mass Effect 3. Full credit goes to BioWare and it's writers.**

* * *

"Shhh!" Avalon put her fingers on her lips and EDI stopped walking towards the door that almost definitely led to the central lab.

"Do you hear that?" Avalon asked, creeping towards the door in a quieter manner. Beside her the A.I went still, lost in thought - or rather, analysing the data that her inquiry had recovered. "I detect two life forms in the room ahead," she said after a while.

"Shepard and Brooks," Avalon hissed. EDI nodded, "My scans show that Shepard's heart rate is steadily increasing. It suggests that she is still in a combat situation."

"Brooks." So Avalon's suspicions had been right after all. She was gonna kill that treacherous little bitch.

"We have to help my sister," she declared, and with that said, she opened the door and rushed in with EDI covering her back.

Brooks had roughed up Shepard quite a bit. But that seemed to be putting it lightly; the way Avalon would have explained it was that Brooks was kicking the shit out of the commander.

"Get away from her!" she yelled, throwing an orb of energy at her sister's attacker. Brooks sprung away from Shepard just in time for the biotic force to narrowly miss its target; throwing something small and circular that landed at Avalon's feet and clouded the room.

Shit. A smoke screen.

But this smoke screen was different and instead of only blocking a rectangular-like path in front of her and EDI, it completely enveloped them in a sphere of smoke. Avalon's eyes stung bitterly and her mind was overwhelmed by frustration as the smoke provoked tears from her. She was completely blind and in the chaos, had lost track of everyone else in the room. But the thought of Brooks beating the crap out of her sister was enough for her temper to kick in. Wheezing and spluttering, Avalon primed her body for a large impact, readying her biotics and visualising a path through the smoke. She released her nova and barrelled through the screen to the other side.

Groaning, she jumped to her feet but then winced as the smoke still lingered in her eyes, intent on hindering her course of action - but ultimately failing when she used the last of her strength to wildly throw a ball of singularity in front of her.

"AVVY!" Shepard's voice came from in front of her; blinking furiously to rid herself of her pesky tears, Avalon stumbled forwards. Once she had put some distance between herself and the edge of the smoke screen, her eyes cleared and the scene before her depicted Brooks struggling in mid-air as she was being pulled towards a purple orb.

"Finish her off!" Shepard was on the ground, bloody-faced and breathless, glaring at the inflictor of her injuries. Avalon aimed her gun at the hovering body but did not shoot immediately. Brooks was putting up one hell of a fight.

"Y-you're i-i-idiots," she snarled at them. It was obvious that every word was a battle now, "Hu...man..ity w-won't w-win. Reapers… are t- too strong. The o-only way… is to… pre...serve VI f-for the next…. cycle."

"No," Avalon replied, "We haven't lost this fight, and I'll be damned if I'm gonna watch as humanity sacrifices itself for a future that we might have won already if not for some pathetic Cerberus jackass - who thinks he can control our enemy with a weapon of mass destruction."

"Kill... m-me then," Brooks replied, "I pro...mise you t-that... you'll be... seeing... me v-very soon."

"Goodbye, Brooks." She pulled the trigger and quickly looked away as she heard a body crash into the floor.

* * *

The Engineering deck was silent when Kaidan stepped out of the elevator. He'd seen Javik roaming around the mess hall when he'd left the observation deck in search of Avalon, and as he descended to the bottom level of the deck he noted that all of the engineers had disappeared - Tali, Adams, Donnelly and Daniels, everyone. They were probably consoling their friends on the other levels and Kaidan was grateful for the privacy. They had maybe around four hours before the Normandy reached Admiral Hackett and the rest of the allies that Shepard had managed to unite together - meaning that in four hours everyone would be in the fight of their lives. And Kaidan didn't know if he or anyone else he loved would make it.

He found her tinkering with her phantom armour; omni-tool out and analysing the possible last minute tweaks that she could apply before they reached the Sol system.

"Avvy?" he asked, placing his free hand on her shoulder gently - the other holding a bottle of scotch. Her omni-tool faded and she turned to face him reluctantly. Her eyes were slightly bloodshot and tears clung to her eyelashes.

"Kaidan," she said after a while, voice almost cracking. Instinctively he put the scotch to one side and wrapped his arms around her, hugging her tightly.

"That smoke screen really messed me up, huh?" she joked, nestling her head against his shoulder.

"It's okay to be scared," he kissed the top of her head and sighed into her hair. She looked up and met his eyes, "It's not me I'm worried for - it's you."

"Why?" Her analytic eyes could see he was masking his fear with an unstable calmness and that her comment had surprised him. Kaidan spent so much time worrying about her that he'd never stopped to wonder that maybe she worried in the same way about him.

She stepped back, "Because I see the way you keep watch over me all time like I could drop dead at any minute; as if you're prepared to take a bullet for me."

"I would," he promised. She scowled.

"I don't want to love a dead hero, Kaidan. What the hell do you think I'd do if you died trying to save me? Or what if you died trying to protect me but a few minutes later a husk gets the jump on me and I die anyway?"

"That's not going to hap-"

"I want you to promise me that you won't do anything stupid on my behalf," she interjected. His gaze fell to the floor, "I can't do that, Av."

"Yes you can," her face darkened, "There's a difference between can't and won't."

"Then I won't promise."

"My life isn't worth throwing away yours," she responded quietly, another tear escaping her eye and rolling down her cheek. Kaidan lifted her face to meet his gaze; drinking in the emerald green in her eyes that - once appeared full of fun and defiance - were now broken and hopeless.

He leaned forward and pressed his lips against hers - channelling his despair and fear of losing the woman he loved, into one passionate kiss that caused a jolt of biotic energy to sweep through both of them.

"My life isn't worth anything without yours," he murmured against her lips. Avalon let out a small smile, "Very cliche. Just like in the vids."

They stood with their foreheads touching, eyes closed - focused entirely on each other's presence.

But a few minutes later Kaidan interrupted their silence, "Let's go up and have drink,"

"I should really-"

"Just take 5 minutes. A quick drink. Then I'll go."

Avalon nodded and he grabbed glass bottle with his right hand and intertwined his remaining hand with hers.

"Shall we?" he smiled.

* * *

"I didn't realise you actually slept in here," Avalon noted, eyeing up the newly placed bed that sat in the corner of the observation deck.

"Perks of getting promoted, I guess," he said, pouring them both a drink, "No more crew quarters."

She took the crystal glass that he offered her and sipped the liquid inside tentatively, taking a seat on the couch that faced the large window.

"What would you do if I died?" she asked. He shook his head and sat beside her, "I dunno… what would you do if I died?"

"I don't know…" she took another sip of the drink and then put it on the table beside her, burying her head in her hands.

"Let's make a promise," her voice was muffled, "If one of us doesn't make it, then we'll move on. Try to find someone else in the future."

Kaidan didn't want to promise. He couldn't help but feel that he would break this promise - finding someone else seemed unthinkable after everything he and Avalon had been through. For a moment he felt like refusing her like he had before but thought better of it when she sat back up again: waiting for his answer.

"I promise."

"I promise too." Silence drifted over their heads and they stared out into the millions of stars that the Normandy surpassed.

"What are you thinking right now?" Avalon wanted to know.

He looked thoughtful, "The good times and the… the hard times. It's been an unforgettable few years. But this moment right now," he paused and took her hand in his own, "This moment is my favourite."

The light kiss that she planted on his cheek made his body aflame with lust and soon her hands were tangled in his hair while he began to pepper her neck with soft kisses that grew more intense as he went on. Her sharp intake of breath was met with more biotic tingles that caressed him as she wrapped her legs around him and he carried her towards the bed.

"I lied," he said, between kisses, "I didn't bring us here for a quick drink."

* * *

It was dark and everything had slowed down. She tried to run but found her movements to be sluggish and as a result: terrifying. All around her were shadows that whispered with terrible accusing voices.

"RUN AVALON!" Her father yelled, she recognised his voice from Mindoir. On the day of the attack, "FIND AISLYNN AND GO!"

She tried to run from the memory that taunted her but found herself unable to move from its presence.

"I love you, sweet pea," her mother whispered, "I'll never forget you."

Frozen, Avalon was trapped. Voiceless and motionless - she was now paralyzed with fear.

A leering voice behind her whispered, "Aren't you a pretty thing?"

Please no, she prayed, getting flashbacks to when the raiders had violated her and stripped her of all self-worth. I killed you all. Leave me alone.

"Don't worry, love. Your time has almost come." She barely heard the whispers of Doctor Heart but the sound of his voice made her able to shrink away from it and desperately run as fast as she could, away from the dark shapes that plagued her vision. There was a flash of white that she saw up ahead and she followed it, eager to find something that didn't reflect the dark world that she had found herself in.

As she drew closer, she found herself looking upon a child with red hair and golden brown eyes. Kaidan's eyes, she realised, receiving a newfound sense of protectiveness for this child whom she had never seen before. This was her son.

And then Kaidan was there, kneeling with his arms around his son, smiling as the child showed him a toy starcraft that he had been playing with.

The corners of her mouth twitched and regardless of the situation, she matched her love's smile, falling into an uneasy feeling of protection. If she was with Kaidan then nothing could scare her. Unless…

The flames surrounded him and their child, burning them and contorting their faces with excruciating pain. The harsh screams collide and she felt herself breaking under the pressure as she watched her family burn and die.

* * *

Her eyes snapped open and the first thing she noticed were his arms, that had pulled her body up against his bare chest. Nerves settled in her stomach and she carefully got up and approached the observation window. She knew in her heart that if push came to shove, Kaidan would die for her and her nightmare had made her feel very vulnerable. Remembering the child that had been in her dream had only made her heart blaze. She wanted a family. Maybe Kaidan did too. All they had to do was survive the end of the world.

It seemed impossible.

She sank to her knees and clasped her hands together. Avalon was not one for praying; it seemed unnecessary in the technologically advanced world that she lived in. But she didn't want to go into battle without knowing that she had done everything she could to ensure Kaidan's safety - even if it meant praying to a higher power.

She closed her eyes, "I don't know how this works exactly," her voice was a shaky whisper.

"I've never prayed before. I don't know what it must be like to create a universe and then watch its life forms perish every 50,000 years. I don't even know if you intended for the Reapers to exist. I just know that behind me is the man I love. The man who I want to spend my life with. Who I want to have a family with…" She felt herself slipping and stopped to collect herself.

"Let him live," she begged, "Please… God… Jesus… whoever is listening. Please. Just let me have this one thing."

She stood up, "Thank you. Amen"

He wiped away a runaway tear.

* * *

They were at the home stretch now. All they had to do was reach the beam.

Ahead of her, Shepard was deep in the middle of the action; dodging a truck that flew over her head, which only missed her by a few centimeters. Then she remembered her squad behind her. Avalon and Kaidan were a few yards away, sprinting as fast as they could - attempting to get to Shepard before the truck smashed into them. They were almost there. Just a bit further, Shepard wanted to scream.

The truck didn't hit them directly. Instead, it landed upright, dead on their path; gravity began to pull it down on top of them. Everything within Avalon's gaze began to slow. If she wanted to escape death then she and Kaidan should have dodged around the new obstacle and kept going, but now here they were, paralyzed and unmoving while the flaming truck descended on top of them.

"AVVY!" Someone barrelled into her and she went soaring through the air; there was an audible crack as some of the ribs broke when the right side of her body impacted the dirt. Black spots swarmed her vision for a few seconds. Who the hell had pushe-

"KAIDAN!" the truck exploded, spraying sharp, hot shards of metal everywhere. Fire embraced the parts of her body that were exposed to the wreckage. The smoke that surrounded the crash was dense, so Avalon couldn't find him amidst it all but she didn't have long to think about it because a stray piece of debris pierced her armour and was driven through the charred skin of her left thigh. Red seeped from the wound but she ripped the metal from her leg anyway; blood began to steadily gush out of the hole in her thigh. She was able to get to her feet, although Avalon doubted she'd be able to stay up for long with broken ribs and the state of her leg. Working as quickly as she could, she got the last of her medi-gel and applied it to her wound so that it acted as a seal that would be sufficient.

The smoke had begun to clear away and Avalon caught sight of another figure approaching the wreckage.

"Kaidan?" she managed to croak out.

"Are you okay, Avvy?" It was Shepard. She felt a hand go around her waist and she pulled away.

"I'm fine. Help Kaidan."

The commander saw him struggling to get up, and she swiftly put a supporting arm around him and led him to the side of the hectic runway, behind another truck.

"Normandy! Do you copy?" But the comm was silent and the gunfire around them swelled.

"I need an evac. Right now!" the commander roared.

"We're taking heavy losses up here, Commander." Joker snapped.

Shepard glanced across at her squadmates. Already, Avalon was losing the colour in her cheeks and her breathing had become very shallow. Beside her, Kaidan was fighting desperately to keep his eyes open. He was losing blood at an alarming rate and his armour was all but useless; the explosion had melted half of it and even now Shepard could smell his burning flesh as the raiment that was designed to protect him, ate away at him instead.

"On our way, Commander!" Joker declared, pulling the Normandy into view and manoeuvring it over the chaos. The truck that was acting as their cover took another hit, causing Avalon to cry out as it sent a shock through her entire body. Shepard helped Kaidan back to his feet, "Come on!"

Avalon pushed herself onto her feet - ignoring the protests that the heavy burns on her left side groaned - and limped towards the Normandy behind her sister. The shuttle bay door of the frigate opened up to reveal EDI who reached her hand out to take Kaidan. Alliance soldiers followed the AI - focused on covering the gathering during the exchange. Once Kaidan was behind EDI, she held her hand out to Avalon. For a brief moment, the doctor thought about accepting the offer of help but then remembered her nightmare. If she went aboard the Normandy, she would be helpless but if she stayed here... Shepard might have thought she was invincible but she wasn't. Without any squadmates - even injured ones - she would never make it to the beam.

"I'm staying with Shepard." She announced.

"The hell you are!" her sister snapped, "This is non-negotiable. Now take EDI's hand."

"You won't make it to the beam by yourself, Ash!"

"You're injured!"

"So are you!" She shot back. Kaidan shuffled forward and stared at his beloved with pleading eyes; melting her heart in the process.

"I'm not leaving without you, Av. Where you go, I go."

Avalon shook her head, "Not this time Kaidan."

"Don't leave me behind," he begged, reaching for her.

She took his hand and leaned forward, caressing his face: "If I don't come back..."

He kissed her, "You have to promise me you'll come back."

"I can't do that, Kaidan."

"A smart woman told me that there's a difference between can't and won't."

Avalon lost herself in his eyes for the last time; drawing away from him after more crucial seconds were spent.

"I love you." she said, turning away.

EDI led him up the ramp, and he watched with a heavy heart as the woman he loved turned away from safety and went openly out into the field of battle again.

"I will always love you." he murmured.

* * *

"God... they're all gone."

"Did we get anyone to the beam?"

"Negative. Our entire force was decimated."

"It's too much. We need to regroup. Fall back to the buildings..."

Avalon's head was reeling, her eyes blazing from the bright Reaper beam that she had tried to shield herself from. The voices in the comm buzzed in her ear and made her singed body throb - reminding her of all of the mornings she had experienced after clubbing all night at the Citadel. But then she began to listen to the voices.

"Hammer's wiped out. All forces... retreat."

They talked about a squad as if they were all dead. Shepard's squad, she realised. But was she dead? She wriggled her fingers, which were slick with blood. If she was dead then this was not what she expected it to be like. A barely audible grunt reached her ears and she painfully turned to see Shepard crawling on the ground beside her.

"A- Av...vy?" Shepard rasped, creeping further and further towards her little sister with great effort and a pistol in her hand. It was then that Avalon noted the absence of her own weapon and she cringed. All around them were corpses of those who had tried and failed before them. The odour of death was overpowering.

"Can... you... walk?" she prompted and Shepard grunted.

"Need... h-help."

A squeak escaped from the doctor's lips while she got to her feet and her sister snarled when she was standing upright again, her pistol slipping from her grasp. Avalon retrieved it but didn't give it back. Ahead of them was the beam - they were so close. They just had to make it a few more yards and they would have reached the goal that hundreds of thousands had died in order to achieve.

"Just... keep... going." she encouraged, supporting Shepard when they limped forward. The pressure on her ribs was excruciating and it only got worse with every step but regardless, Avalon would not let her sister fall.

"Rgghhhhh! Rghhhhhh!" It was the sound Avalon dreaded. Husks. Usually, they would not be a match for her, but now... when she was so vulnerable. There were three of them and the thought of using her biotics made her want to collapse. Then she remembered the pistol.

BANG! The one closest to them fell.

BANG! The shot struck its target but it did not fall. They were getting closer and closer. If she didn't act quicker then they would all die.

BANG! The second one fell.

BANG! The last one fell at their feet. Thank God.

Each step they took felt like an age and the beam had them squinting their eyes against the light as they went. A figure emerged from cover and Avalon recognised it to be a Marauder. It's first shot missed and she took the opportunity to hit it square in the chest, staggering it.

BANG! The bullet shredded the former turian and like the husks, it also fell.

And then at last, it was there in front of them. Avalon held her breath and threw herself and Shepard into the white light.

* * *

"This is the admiral. We've got reports that someone made it to the Citadel."

* * *

Avalon had managed to keep herself alive for all this time, but she could feel herself slipping when she was thrown with a massive force onto the cold, metal floor of the station.

Shepard had been thrown on top of her as well and she did her best to muffle her scream.

"Shepard?" It was Anderson. But the commander could barely move, yet alone speak.

"Shepard?"

"Admiral? Are you up here too?" Avalon asked.

"Followed you and Shepard up, but we didn't come out in the same place... at least I don't think we did. What's your surrounding look like?"

Shepard retched at the smell that was attached to the grotesque piles of bodies that lined the hall, but got to her feet.

"You okay?" Anderson sounded worried.

"I feel like death," Avalon agreed with her sister on that, "But I'm moving," Shepard said, limping down the hallway while describing to the Admiral what he saw.

"It's dark... there're human remains scattered."

"Sounds familiar," Anderson replied, grimly, "I'm in a dark hallway... reminds me of your description of the Collector Base."

"Makes sense," Avalon said.

"You think they're making a Reaper in here?" Anderson asked.

Shepard scowled, "Sure. They round them up on Earth and then send the people up here to be processed."

Anderson sighed, "Goddamn abomination. I'm going to keep moving. The sooner we blow those bastards back to hell, the better."

* * *

After they had crossed the chasm, the comm link with Anderson failed.

"Damn it," Shepard swore. They had to go up a steep ramp which led out into a platform. It was there that they saw Anderson, messing with a control panel - despite not getting anywhere with it."

"See if you can help him," Shepard told her sister, "But give me the gun." Avalon nodded, handing over the pistol and then made her way over to the Admiral.

"Let me, sir." she offered, but he didn't appear to have heard her.

"Anderson?" Shepard asked.

Ignoring Avalon, the man slowly turned around with great difficulty. Avalon's gaze followed him.

"Shepard," he gasped, "I... can't..."

"I underestimated you, Shepard." Avalon saw a strange look pass over the commander's eyes and her heart filled with dread when The Illusive Man walked out from behind Shepard.

Shepard tried to resist the whispering in her mind, "What have...?"

"I warned you," The Illusive Man went on, "Control is the means to survival. Control of the Reapers... and of you, if necessary."

His abnormal eyes flickered to Avalon but if he was surprised to see her, he did not show it.

"They're controlling you." Anderson realised.

"I don't think so, Admiral." he responded, coldly.

"Controlling Shepard is a lot different to controlling a Reaper," Avalon interjected.

He turned to her, "Have a little faith." She could smell the tobacco on his breath.

"The discovery of the Prothean Archives on Mars advanced our technology by 10,000 years," he paused, "The Reapers will do the same for us again. A thousand fold. But..."

The whispers clawed their way into the center of her mind, seeking to destroy any free-will they could find; replacing it with manipulated ideas.

"...only if we can harness their ability to control." He circled around the commander.

Raise the gun, Shepard thought before realising what it was she was thinking. Don't do it, she gritted her teeth. Don't listen.

Her hand tightened around the pistol and she pointed it at her sister.

"Bullshit," Anderson said, "We destroy them, or they destroy us."

"And waste this opportunity? Never," The Illusive Man disagreed.

"We're not ready!" Shepard argued.

"No. This is the way humanity must evolve."

"There's always another way," Anderson stated.

"Look at the power they wield!" The Illusive Man declared, raising his arm, "Look at what they can do!"

Shoot them both, Shepard urged. She pulled the trigger. Twice.

Anderson stumbled when the bullet hit him but he stayed standing. Only just.

"ARGH!" Avalon collapsed, her figure hunched over on the floor, gasping for air. Breathe. She told herself, In...out...in...out. She'd never been fazed by the sight of blood before. Until now.

* * *

The Illusive Man was dead. Shepard activated the arms of the Citadel.

"This is it, everyone," Hackett said, "The arms are opening." From the console Shepard could see the massive construct approaching the Presidium ring.

"Ten seconds to contact."

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

6.

7.

8.

9.

10.

CLUNK.

"That's it! The Crucible is docked!"

* * *

Avalon could barely move. She knew she was dying and even at the thought of Kaidan waiting for her on the Normandy, she knew that survival was now next to impossible. It was a miracle that she had lived this long after all of the injuries she had sustained with only a medi-gel pack on her leg. She and Anderson now sat facing the console - and the fleet that was out in space fighting the good fight.

Shepard joined them.

"Commander," Anderson greeted.

"We did it," she replied.

He winced, "Yes. We did."

"It's quite a view," Avalon admitted. It was almost as grand as the view that she had gazed at when she had prayed for Kaidan. It seemed impossible that that was only 7 hours ago.

"Best seats in the house," Shepard joked.

"God... feels like years since I just sat down." Anderson's eyes drooped.

"I think you earned a rest." He didn't reply.

"Anderson?"

"Mmm."

"Stay with us. We're almost through this."

"You did good, child," Shepard's eyes began to water, "You did good," he continued, "I'm proud of you." His head dropped and he ceased to move.

"Thank you, sir." She checked on his still form, "Anderson?"

"He's gone, Ash." Avalon wheezed. It wasn't long before she faded from the world either. Already, crimson blood had pooled onto the floor. God, she had lost so much blood. Even Shepard could sense her hesitation.

"Focus, Avvy. Breathe. In and out. Don't you dare leave me. Kaidan would kick my ass."

"He'd probably enjoy that," Avalon joked. Her sister glared.

"Maybe before he met you. He is utterly besotted. You mean everything to him."

"Did... he say anything?"

"The reason he tried to talk to you at the club... I told him... he had to find that one person he wanted to fight for... and never let them go."

She let out a laugh that sent another wave of nausea crashing into her, "He certainly did that."

"Exactly. So don't go... disappearing on him now. Or on... me. I just lost... one family member," Shepard looked at Anderson, "I can't... lose... you as well."

"Shepard! Commander!" It was Hackett.

"I- What do you need me to do?" the commander turned her attention to the Crucible, attached to the station; scrambling to her feet clumsily in the process.

"Nothing's happening. The Crucible's not firing." She fell to the floor. Avalon tried to help her, but it was now apparent how much of an endeavour it was for a dying woman to stand up.

"It's got to be something on your end," Hackett told them.

The console was right above her head, yet Shepard lacked the strength to reach it. Avalon crawled up beside her, deciding to use her biotics - this soon failed. Her energy was gone. Only a few wisps of life even remained in her. I'll never use my biotics again, she told herself.

"Commander Shepard!" Hackett exclaimed. Avalon wished he would shut up. They were so close...

"I don't see- I'm not sure how to..." Shepard faltered, and then fell.

"Commander!"

Avalon leaned over and checked her sister's pulse. The commander was still alive. Barely.

The platform they were on began to rise.

* * *

"We find a new solution." The Catalyst declared, turning towards the three different coloured conduits in front of them.

"Why are you telling me this? Why help me?" Shepard wanted to know. Avalon didn't know how long she had blacked out for, but she hadn't expected to wake up. She got to her feet.

"You have altered the variables." it said.

"What do you mean?"

"The Crucible changed me, created new... possibilities. But I can't make them happen. If there is to be a new solution, you must act."

Its gaze swept over the red conduit on the right, "It is now in your power to destroy us. But be warned: others will be destroyed as well. The Crucible will not discriminate. All synthetics will be targeted. Even you are partly synthetic."

Shepard seemed doubtful, "There has to be another way."

"There is." The AI stared at the blue conduit on the left.

"You could instead, use the energy of the Crucible to seize control of the Reapers."

"So... the Illusive Man was right after all," she whispered.

"Yes, but he never could have taken control... because we already controlled him."

"But I can..."

It stared at him with analytical eyes, "You will die. You will control us but, you will lose everything you have." Garrus. Avalon. She didn't want to leave them but what choice did she have? If she chose to destroy the Reapers then she would be committing murder. It would kill the geth, which would mean the quarians would not be able to readapt to the atmosphere on Rannoch for generations.

"There is another solution," it said, gesturing to the last conduit in the center that glowed green.

"Synthesis." Avalon joined them. Shepard stared at her, "How do you know."

"It seems... to be... the only other... option," she replied.

The commander looked for confirmation from the AI, "And that is?"

"Add your energy to the Crucible's. The chain reaction will combine all synthetic and organic life into a new framework. A new... DNA."

"Explain how my energy can be added to the Crucible." the commander asked, even though she was sure she already knew.

"Your organic energy, the essence of who and what you are, will be broken down and then dispersed."

"To do what exactly?"

It turned to face her, "The energy of the Crucible, released in this way, will alter the matrix of all organic life in the galaxy. Organics will be perfected by integrating fully with synthetic technology. Synthetics, in turn, will have full understanding of organics."

Synthesis. This was the ideal means of peace. Avalon watched as her sister considered each and every option, noting that her eyes always ended up locked on the green conduit. It seemed to be the obvious choice, but no doubt Shepard thought it might be too good to be true. There had to be some complications that came with the merging of two different life forms, not to mention that Shepard had to give up her life for this solution. Or did she?

"The paths are open. But you have to choose."

Shepard approached her sister, "We both know what one I have to pick. And we both know what the cost is for choosing it."

"I'm sorry," Avalon told her, wiping a tear away from her scarred skin. Shepard surveyed her face, "What for?"

Avalon mustered what energy she could summon and pushed her sister to the ground, carefully making sure that she didn't injure the commander further.

"What are you doing?" Shepard demanded.

"The galaxy will need you when it has been synthesized," she announced, "I'm far less valuable."

"Don't you dare," Shepard hissed, "Don't you dare throw your life away."

"Haven't you learned by now, Ash? I never do what I'm told." She was crying now, but she furiously tried to turn off the waterworks, "I'm dead no matter what happens, anyway. Tell Kaidan..." she sniffed, "Tell him... I love him and... to remember his promise."

And then without looking back, she nodded at the AI and leaped into the depths of the green conduit.

"Goodbye, Kaidan," she whispered. It was the right choice, and she was proud of what she had made of the life she had been given. Her only regret was that she would never get to meet that red-haired child with golden brown eyes.

* * *

 **So that's the end. I'm fairly happy with this fanfic and as I've said before, I am eternally grateful for the reviews that were given to me about it. I'm not planning on doing an epilogue because I do like where I left it but maybe… I don't know. This chapter really got to me. Even though I've watched those last scenes with Anderson so many times, it just made it so much realer to have Avalon there as well, I can't explain it. So yes, thank you so much for reading. I've decided to polish up those earlier chapters that I did, because I know they are riddled with errors that I missed. Thank you again for joining me on this little AU journey.**

 **Avalon01k**


	17. Two More Names

_Adm. David Anderson._

 _Dr. Avalon Shepard._

* * *

 _I can't bring myself to look at the memorial wall for a second longer than the time it took for me to place her name on it. Why did hers have to be one of them? If two people had to die at the end of this war, why did her name - out of the trillions out there - have to be chosen?_

 _Her presence was the only thing I had felt in months and now suddenly, I have been cut off from it all at once; almost as if I was depending on her more than I realised. More than even she realised._

* * *

Shepard had survived. Barely. Doctor Chakwas had been treating her for an hour when she finally announced to what remained of the crew that the commander was going to pull through. The crash landing of the Normandy had shaken everyone; so they clung to this thread of good news with both hands.

Synthesis. That was what Shepard had muttered before she had been taken to Chakwas. It was what everyone was calling what had happened to the galaxy - the explanation for the Reaper's sudden surrender. It was the final stage of evolution.

Avalon would have loved to see this, Kaidan let himself think, before he isolated himself to his quarters. But his mind would not be quiet when there were traces of her everywhere. The couch, the bed - even the great window itself, where she had knelt and appealed to a God she had never turned to before. Everything had her in it, yet not enough for Kaidan to be satisfied. He didn't want her memory or her things. He wanted _her_. Doctor Avalon Shepard - saviour of the galaxy alongside her sister, and the mother of synthesis. Instead she had left her legacy behind in the form of the green code that was patched across every living thing in the galaxy. She'd even given away her eyes - which he now saw when he stared at anyone. It was painful for him to even glimpse at the surviving commander because she was the spitting image of her sister.

Kaidan approached her now, in the med-bay, purposely keeping his gaze low so he could avoid seeing the angry red welts and scars that plagued the commander's skin. His eyes met hers for one second. It was all he needed in order for the guilt to settle in his gut. Had her injuries matched Shepard's when she had sacrificed herself for the galaxy? Did she know that she was going to die and jumped to her end so that her death might have meaning?

"She left a message for you," the commander said, not looking at him, although he wouldn't have noticed anyway.

"She said she loved you and… to remember your promise."

His promise. He knew what he had said. Knew that they had both vowed to move on in case the other didn't make it. There was just a small part of him that hoped they would both live to tell embarrassing stories about how they met to their children and grandchildren.

Instead he would have to tell stories about the Avalon Synthesis; about how it bonded all species together through her. Or perhaps he wouldn't tell stories at all. He could never love another woman in the same way he had loved her.

"We also found this on the Engineering deck," Shepard pointed to a silver metal box that sat on Chakwas' desk, "It won't open but I wouldn't put it past my sister to have placed a few of her little tricks on it."

Kaidan raised his head and eyed the box. It was simple enough in design - about the same size as a small jewellery box. For a moment he wondered if that was all it was, but when he reached out to touch it, the box flashed biotic purple and a sliver of energy jolted through his body. He recognised the feeling immediately and even though it seemed silly, he just _knew_ that somehow Avalon had managed to store a small inkling of her energy. He imagined her down on the Engineering deck working furiously to consider all the variables and wrinkling her nose like she usually did when something went wrong. A small smile played on his lips. How many hours had she put into this project? What was in the box?

"I think it's a gray box," Shepard said, "Kasumi had one. They contain memories."

He placed his hand back on the metal surface, almost disappointed that nothing happened immediately. Beside him, Shepard was watching - curious to see what happened.

Minutes passed. The box remained silent.

"That's it then?" Shepard asked, "Maybe it isn't a gray box."

"Or maybe she didn't finish her work on it," he replied, frowning. He removed his hand, it felt heavier than before.

"Biometrics confirmed," he never thought he'd hear that voice again.

"Voice message 1. Recorded 46 hours ago." 46 hours. The day before they had spent the night together.

"Kaidan," Avalon's voice sounded like it always had - bright with an underlined, more mature tone, "So if you're listening to this - and I'm gonna guess that Ash is with you too at this point - then I'm dead," there was a pause. He shared a confused look with Shepard. The recording went on, "And that's okay! I mean I was gonna die anyway - might as well go down fighting the 'Harbinger of your destruction'," she mimicked the First Reaper lightly, as she had with Admiral Hackett's solemn attitude after Rannoch.

"But I've been thinking about this for a while - the after effects of my death I mean. I can't help it. I don't want to leave you alone. I don't want to leave at all - but it isn't my choice. I'm as willing as my sister to give my life in the name of duty; it must just be the Shepard streak in me," she joked, "I've been trying to have it removed but I've already spent too long in the hospital recently."

A laugh escaped his mouth. It was so… _odd_. She wasn't there but yet her voice was; joking about the final mission as if it was just like any other assignment that had gone wrong. When Kaidan imagined someone recording a final message, he definitely hadn't imagined _this_.

"So as a result of all of this thinking," Avalon said, "I decided that I wanted to leave part of myself behind. You probably won't recover my body," Kaidan touched his cheek, where he knew green code lingered and shined, "So I contacted Kasumi Goto and told her I needed a gray box. I don't know how the hell she managed to do it, but a few days later she visited me in the Citadel with this little beauty."

Shepard nodded to herself, absentmindedly.

"It's only accessible to the people I care most about, you - Kaidan Alenko - and Aislynn. Even then, you can only activate this voice message when my heart stops beating and the sensor that I planted within the box loses my pulse. I am dead. I'm not coming back. I can only offer my memories, if you need them," Kaidan noticed that she used 'need them' rather than 'want them'.

"Use them, Kaidan - you too Ash. Then move on. That's an order." Avalon commanded. "If you find someone else, Kaidan - you have my blessing, not that you need it but I know you. You're not 'betraying' me by loving someone else. I know you won't forget me. I will never forget you, and I love you both." Kaidan swallowed, listening to her final words, "I'll see you on the other side," she announced, "Until then, well… take care. Tell the crew I said goodbye - but tell them my last words were really philosophical and intelligent; I have a reputation to uphold, you know?"

The recording cut out, leaving the box of memories silent.

Kaidan inhaled deeply. He still felt shaky - the shock hadn't worn off yet. But he felt more at peace. He might have wanted to have Avalon instead of just her memories, but it wasn't going to happen. At least he had this piece of her.

Exhaling, he reached towards the box and activated it. A blue visor appeared over his eyes - Shepard wore an identical one.

It was time to start again - with Avalon's help.

For **Author's Note** see _the first paragraph in italics above_


End file.
